To Taylor on your birthday

Dear Taylor,

Today you turned 3 years old. You started seeming older to me a few weeks ago, a little calmer and more obedient. I remember the day you were born. I was so very worried about being a mother of 2 little boys so close together. I felt like I was still figuring things out as a mother of one. It's funny to remember that now. I had gone to church alone because your dad was sick. I began having contractions pretty consistently, but it was 4 weeks before my due date. That night I woke up at 3:00 am and knew it was time to go to the hospital. I remember the car ride. Holy cow, every three minutes I thought I would die. I got an epidural right when I got there and you were born within an hour. Perfect. Most of all I remember looking into your eyes for the first time. It was as though you were saying "I won't be any trouble" and my fears of inadequacy melted in my love for you. And you really have been a joy to me everyday.
You make me smile everytime I'm around you. You are so very unique. I love how much you love dinosaurs, and before that it was animals in general, and before that it was horses. You love carrying things around with you. In nursery you'll fill a bin with your favorite toys then carry them around, just to have them. Maybe that is a result of having to share so much at home. You love putting things in bags, or tying them together with a string. You'll bring me a hanger, a key chain, a dinosaur, and a pen and want me to tie them all together. When I comply you are so so happy and you'll carry them around with you, inside and outside-wherever you go, for hours.

You are so happy and you love to laugh. You are very perceptive of when I think you're funny and that makes you overjoyed. You are very funny. You have the fattest feet ever. Like a little hobbit. They make me smile, except when I have to shove them into sunday shoes...then neither one of us is smiling.

I crave one-on-one time with you as much as you do with me. I love getting you alone and getting inside your brain. You love books but haven't the patience for all the words that your brothers do. You much prefer a more interactive approach that involves you finding things on the page or explaining the pictures. You are smart and exuberant. You make life interesting and funny.

Today we are at Grandma's and you liked being king of the day. We had a hot dog roast, Marielle made you a birthday cake, you got some wonderful presents. At the end of the day I found you asleep on the floor in Brian's room. No pillow, no blanket. So tired. I love you, my little Tays. You are a joy to raise and I often wonder who you will become, you are just so facinating to me. I adore all that you are.

Love,
Mom

PS. did I mention you crack me up