tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-59285453996203644192024-03-02T09:30:16.892-08:00My Corner of SatisfactionThe true story of a girl who grew up and got everything she really wantedNataliehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12768195400316361623noreply@blogger.comBlogger366125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5928545399620364419.post-83806506625080382762023-06-20T15:37:00.000-07:002023-06-20T15:37:26.670-07:00AsherMy pregnancy was a healthy one. I didn't drink the optimal amount of water, but that was all. Everything else always looked great. My blood tests, my fluid levels, my weight gain, my energy, my blood pressure...even my iron was at a respectable level, and I'm typically low. We have had 7 uneventful pregnancies and births. Our last two births had been quick, planned home births and we looked forward to another positive birth experience at home.<br />
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Asher's birth was constantly on my mind those last weeks. I listened to a hypnobirthing CD as I drifted off to sleep, I wrote a page full of positive birth affirmations, I wrote him letters expressing my anticipation of his arrival. I had a few nights full of contractions that then faded away. I tried to be patient. I was grateful that I wasn't incredibly uncomfortable, that I felt ready but not DONE. </div>
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On the morning of August 16th I was excited to feel an increased intensity and pattern to my contractions. I loved the idea of having Asher on 8/16/16. It seemed like a perfect birth date for the 8th child in a family. I texted my midwife that I was having contractions 3-4 minutes apart, lasting about a minute each. She told me to keep her in the loop. By mid afternoon things had died down a bit, but Rebecca texted me and told me if I wanted to come to her office we could see if I was a progressing and maybe help move things along. We drove up right away.</div>
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We got there at about 4 and I was dilated to 4-5. The baby was in the perfect position, but my bulging sack of water was preventing his head from fully engaging. She swept my membranes and had me drink some kind of ginger tonic that she said would help stimulate contractions for a while, then it would be up to my body to keep them going. She advised us to head strait home and predicted that we had a 95% chance of having a baby on the 16th. woo hoo!</div>
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On the ride home, my contractions were more intense for sure, and I was excited. I was dancing along with the radio a bit, pausing now and then to breath through a contraction and give kevin the "this is the real deal" look. Once home, the contractions continued. Kevin ordered pizza, I called my brother Brian to see if he could come up after work to be with our kids downstairs.<br />
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I had texted my dear friend, Amy, earlier in the day informing her of my progress. Aside from being a close friend and fellow home-birther, Amy is our trusted photographer and I was so excited when she had texted me about a week before offering to come be there for Asher's birth. As my contractions intensified, I texted both Amy and Rebecca who both said they'd head our way. They both arrived at around 7pm. I also called my sister in law, Nicole, who I had invited to the birth. She was needed by her family at the moment, but said she'd come when she could. Rebecca was regularly checking my blood pressure and Asher's heart rate. All was normal. </div>
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We just sort of hung out for a while, but my contractions continued. The kids ate pizza. I had a slice, but my mind wasn't on food. I sent Kevin to pick up my prescription pain medication for the after pains so I'd have them ready. My after pains are really intense and although I don't mind natural labor and birth, I hate being in severe pain after. While he was gone Amy rubbed my feet and we took some pictures. I decided to get my kids dressed in somewhat coordinating clothes/jammies so we could be ready for pictures of them meeting their new brother. Rebecca checked me at I was at a 7. She said my sack was very thick and offered to break my water whenever I was ready. Once Brian arrived, I got the kids settled watching a movie downstairs. Kevin got home with the meds. I still felt really good for being in labor.</div>
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Once everything seemed in place, we went to my room and Rebecca broke my water. I knew that my labor would quickly get more intense after that. Adam had been born about 25 minutes after my water broke, Jane had been about the same, and Caleb took about 40 minutes. As predicted, my labor really intensified once she broke my water. I decided to get in the birth tub right away and almost immediately had to have Kevin push on my back as I knelt and leaned against the edge of the tub. I had a few more contractions, seemingly right on top of each other. My mind felt a little panicky and internally I told myself that I needed to get into a better head space, I know how to do this, I can trust my body. I decided I wanted to stand up for the next contraction and have Kevin support me from behind.<br />
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That is the last thing I remember.</div>
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I passed out and the rest of my memories of his birth are very, very dim. Amy and Kevin helped remove me from the tub on to the floor of my room. Then I had a seizure. My body stiffened and I started foaming at the mouth a bit. I wasn't responding. The next thing I remember was hearing myself moaning, but thinking to myself "what is my deal, that's not what I do when I'm in labor" then darkness, then hearing Rebecca say "Natalie, you NEED to push your baby out, he needs to come out now!" and I remember pushing with all I had, but having no awareness of where I was or what was going on or even any pain. Then I remember touching my baby and saying "be okay, please be okay..." but not really seeing him or having a grasp of what was happening. I heard Kevin say he was going to call 911. </div>
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Asher's heart rate had gone down after my seizure. He needed to be born quickly. He had turned and was posterior. Rebecca told Kevin that if the baby wasn't born in the next 2 contractions, we would have to go to the hospital. It took a few different positions and Rebecca helping to ease him out, but he was born quickly. His heart was beating, but he wasn't breathing. After attempts to get him breathing, 911 was called. We live close to the hospital, and they responded quickly, but were unable to revive him. He and Kevin were rushed to the hospital. They attempted to intubate Asher, but the first tube they used was too small. By the time they got the right size tube, his airway had swollen so it took them several attempts. All told, he was without oxygen for about 40 minutes. Life flight was ready to take him to primary children's hospital, but specialists there and doctors at American Fork hospital gave a very grim prognosis. A choice had to be made.<br />
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Meanwhile, at home, I hadn't delivered the placenta when the EMTs arrived. Some remained behind after Asher had been rushed off, but left soon after, though it's not clear why. I don't remember much about delivering the placenta, but after that I started to regain some more awareness. I was moved to my bed, but began bleeding a lot. Like, if I moved I could feel blood sloshing out. Rebecca gave me some things (pitocin, cytotec, something else) to help with the hemorrhaging, but it was clear to Amy and my neighbor, Marylin (who had just recently arrived after seeing the lights from the ambulance) that I was not doing well. I was still on the fringes of consciousness, like I was an observer but not a participant. Marylin told me later she recognized all of the symptoms of shock in me, and knew how serious that can be. Amy and Marylin consulted each other and decided to call Kevin and have him send the EMTs back to get me. I'm grateful for the things Rebecca gave me before they arrived, and I'm grateful for the friends who got me to the hospital safely. Looking back, I think both of those things worked together to help save my life.<br />
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I remember as I rode in the ambulance that I prayed for myself, for my life. Why Asher was not the subject of my prayers, I don't know. But I prayed that I would be okay, that I would be able to stay here with Kevin and my children. I felt lots of blood leaving my body on that short trip. When we arrived at the hospital, Kevin was standing there waiting. The look on his face was awful. I looked to him, confused, and he said Asher wasn't going to make it. He told me of life flight, and the opinions of the specialists. Meanwhile, the hospital staff checked my blood levels and somehow they came back normal (they definitely weren't). I think I was given an IV at that point, and some more pitocin to help with the bleeding. The focus was on Asher, and what to do. It all seemed to take forever. It's hard to think about all of this, and I've had to write in pieces because it's overwhelming to write it out and relive it. There were so many people there in that moment. Doctors, life flight people, nurses, Rebecca, Amy, Nicole, Kevin's dad, Brian. And Kevin and I needed to make the call. Do we life flight him or not. He was stabilized and on machines at that point, so there wasn't a huge sense of urgency. But still, it all seemed to take so long.<br />
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Amy asked that Asher be moved in by me. I feel like I was seeing him for the first time. He was beautiful, and his body was so pink and strong looking. How? How could this big, strong baby not be okay? <br />
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The pediatrician there said there was a less then 1% chance of him surviving with any real brain function and that if it were his son, he wouldn't life flight him. Kevin and I each got a priesthood blessing from his dad. Mine was all about peace and moving on and healing and being there for my children. But as he said the words, I felt a real clarity that life flight was the right choice. I wasn't there for Kevin's, but when he came back in, I got to hold Asher for a minute and again I felt like we had to give it a chance. I expressed that to Kevin and he agreed. So, away they went together in the helicopter.<br />
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I was taken to a room then, and my after pains were excruciating. Amy, Nicole, and Brian were there. Danny and Nicole had taken all of my kids to their house to sleep, so after a while Nicole went to be there so Danny wouldn't be alone with 13 kids all night. My bleeding was still bad. They checked my blood levels again and they were almost half what they had originally thought, so blood transfusions were ordered. A doctor came in and explained that I had had eclampsia and HELLP syndrome. I was put on magnesium because of the seizure, and also put on a clear liquid diet, just in case I seized again. I still don't know if that was the right call. Maybe I'll write more about that later. Maybe not.<br />
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It was the hardest night of my life so far. Brian pushed on my knees as Amy pushed on my lower back to help ease the after pains. It took a long time to get medication, and when I got it, I threw up. In that moment, I felt I couldn't bear it. I felt scared, in intense pain, heartbroken, alone (without Kevin), and now I was throwing up. It felt like rock bottom. But I felt a kinship with my Savior that I had never before felt. I thought of Him in Gethsemane, feeling all of this and so much more so that he could know just how I felt in that most crushing moment.<br />
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Fortunately, I'd only had half the allowed dose, so I got the other half and prayed it would stay down. Brian went home at my request and brought back a heating pad to help with the cramps, plus a phone charger and some clothes. After a while, that pain was manageable. I sent Brian home at around 2 or 3, knowing he had work the next day. Amy stayed with me and I don't think either of us slept at all. The magnesium made me miserable, and my heart was so so sad. Amy put a cool cloth on my head and held two cool cloths on my feet. The magnesium made me feel hot, but I also needed the heating pad to help with the pain, so this was incredibly comforting. I don't know how much sense I made, but she talked with me all night. She was an angel and walked with me through my darkest night.<br />
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Doctors, nurses, and family members told me I had been in bad shape and that I might not have survived. I never saw a bright light or a beckoning being, but I felt barely conscious, even after Asher was life flighted. Friends and family members have since told me how scary it was to see me. It seemed to take the doctor/hospital staff forever to take my condition seriously. My blood transfusions didn't come until 4 in the morning, 6 hours after I arrived at the hospital. I was told several times that because I hadn't been at the hospital for the birth, they (the group of OBs on call at the hospital during my stay) couldn't really know what happened, and it seemed they weren't anxious to figure it out. They were dismissive to Rebecca when she was showing them my charts and didn't seem to ask for additional information. I felt that they never listened to me or tried to help me find answers. I've never had a problem with doctors or hospitals and my decision to do a home birth was based more on the fact that my babies come quickly and I like the peace of it. I have definitely received more personalized care from midwives than doctors, but I've always maintained a respect for doctors, their skill, and their knowledge. I was, however, very disappointed in this case. I feel they let their bias toward midwives and home births effect the way I was treated and cared for during this incredibly traumatic time. I was about as broken as a person can be, and it's painful still, months later, to think of how I was treated and the things that were said.<br />
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My hospital stay in general was rough. I have never felt so weak in my entire life. I wasn't allowed anything but clear liquids and the magnesium combined with my already low blood pressure left me unable to sit up without feeling incredibly light headed, and completely depleted of energy or strength. I could barely hold my phone and even forming coherent sentences was a struggle. My brain wouldn't turn off, though, and I didn't feel groggy mentally. I was super tired, but between the many interruptions and the weird side effects from the magnesium (feeling super hot, then cold, throwing up, etc) I hardly slept.<br />
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My mom came. I'd called her on my way home from my appointment with Rebecca and told her chances were good that Asher was coming that night. I have had false alarms before, though, so I told her I'd let her know if/when my water broke. After hanging up, she felt she should just come right away. After checking airline tickets and finding that none would get here there before late afternoon the following day, she hopped in the car with Peter and started driving. She was in Missoula, Montana when she got the call from Kevin about Asher. She was able to meet Kevin at Primary Children's early in the morning, then come down to see me, then go be with my kids. What a blessing.<br />
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I had very little hope for Asher's survival. Even when I made the decision about the life flight, I knew it was the right choice, but I didn't expect him to live. There was a sliver of hope for a great outcome, but just a tiny one. I did see miracles, though, and never second guessed that it was meant to play out the way it did. Because of that choice, Kevin was able to be with his tiny boy almost constantly for his short life. He was able to spend priceless hours with him in the NICU at primary children's and both he and Asher were tenderly cared for.<br />
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Meanwhile, back at the hospital...I pleaded with my nurses to take me off the magnesium. I felt it was doing more harm than good and the doctor who prescribed it had said 12-24 hours depending on how I was doing. Well, no doctor came after 12 hours, so the nurses relayed my request and were permitted to lower the magnesium dose slightly. This didn't help at all. And still no food. I wanted to leave. I wanted to hold my son while he was still alive. Every hour seemed so long and I felt so weak and helpless. Finally, an angel came. Nurse Kay was the charge nurse but had taken on a regular shift my second night in the hospital. She listened to me. She was my advocate. She got me off the magnesium and off diet restrictions. Kevin came with a plate of spaghetti. I could barely hold the fork. I ate half the meat from the sauce and couldn't eat more. News of Asher was as I thought, no activity on his brain scans. We needed to decide when to take him off life support.<br />
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Kevin didn't stay long. He was anxious to get back to Asher and I wanted him to be there with our sweet baby. Mikelle had driven up and stayed with me that night. We wept together. Late in the night, Mikelle was sleeping on the couch and Nurse Kay came in to check on me. She asked how I was doing and I broke down. She sat on the side of my bed and held me like a grandma. She listened as I explained why I'd chosen a home birth and the peace I'd felt about that choice. I knew there was judgement from the hospital staff, I assumed there would be judgement from acquaintances and even close friends and family. It all felt heavy on top of everything else. She said all the right things and helped to dissipate the mounting sense of regret and guilt I was feeling. She was kind and understanding and I felt no condescension or condemnation. She was such a blessing.<br />
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With her help, I was able to leave the following evening after 2 days spent in the hospital. It was Thursday night, and I slept well in my own bed. My children were so comforting and just being around them brought so much comfort.<br />
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I was still very weak, but the following morning (Friday, the 19th), I was able to go up and hold Asher. I worried it would be horrible to see him, knowing he would be gone in a matter of days. I prayed that I could endure the day and be granted the strength I needed, both physically and emotionally. I was. I asked Amy and my mom to join us. It felt good to be out of the hospital and back with the people I loved. Kevin wheeled me up to his room. Oh, my heart. He was so beautiful and the love I felt for him was indescribable. There was a sweet and powerful spirit about him.<br />
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It was so very heartbreaking at first. Seeing him and touching him and longing for things to be different. Oh, that they could have been different. All of my hopes and plans for this dear boy, my heart just ached that it could never be so. I wanted him, I wanted to keep him, with all my heart I wanted him to stay and be mine. I wanted to take him home to his siblings who had prayed for him daily throughout my pregnancy. He would be so loved and adored by all of us. But now we had only a few days before we would have to say goodbye. I felt like I could never make these moments be enough. I breathed in his smell and kissed his fuzzy head. I ran my fingers across his soft skin and held his tiny hand. I whispered my love to him and sobbed. I still sob when I think of it.<br />
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Holding him, though, felt sacred and joyful. I'd feel a wave of grief here and there, but a general sense of peace overpowered the sadness. This perfect little body and the celestial soul linked to it filled my heart to the brim. He was mine. Too short here on this earth, but eternally linked to me forever, and being with him, especially holding him, felt like stepping a foot into heaven. I felt a sense of who he was and felt humbled that I was able to be his mama.<br />
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Kayla, a kind soul who worked at Primary Children's as part of a music therapy program, came and spoke with us about Asher and our feelings for him. <br />
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Within a few days, she had written a song in his honor and sang it at both his blessing and funeral. It wasn't something I would have thought of, but I'm grateful we accepted when it was offered. It was a beautiful tribute and memorial of his short life and the impact it had on those of us who love him.<br />
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Because I was still so weak, I couldn't stay as long as I would have liked. I'm so grateful for that day, though. The hospital staff couldn't have been more caring, Amy perfectly captured all the things I would want to remember, and I was so grateful that I got to share the experience with my mom, who has always come to help when I've had a baby. It just seems right that she was there with us.<br />
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This post has been long, and a long time in the making. It's now been almost 14 months since Asher was born. I've shed a lot of tears as I've recalled the feelings associated with each aspect of his birth and short life. It seems exhausting to now write of his blessing, death, and funeral, but I don't want to drag this out for another year...<br />
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The following day, Saturday the 20th, we invited our families to come so they could meet Asher and join with us in giving him a Blessing. This day was full of mixed emotions. I was happy to have so many people I loved gathered together in love for their tiny brother, nephew, grandson, and cousin. It was powerful to see the support we have on this earth in the form of such amazing people. On the other hand, it was hard to share our tiny window of time with anyone. There wasn't enough to share. But everyone who came added to the significance of the day, the impact of his little life, and in the end I thought it was perfect.<br />
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My children got to come in and hold him first. I wanted pictures of each of them with him. I don't know how they will each one day view this experience, this hello and goodbye, this disappointing conclusion to their months of anticipation. It was sweet and hard. I felt I was able to put my grief aside for the most part and help them to navigate this complicated experience. Some were happily oblivious, others were deeply sad. Jack seemed to take it the hardest, and I appreciated his reaction as it mirrored so much of what I was feeling.<br />
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After this, we invited everyone into the room and our Bishop presided over his blessing. Kayla sang his song, Kevin bore a powerful testimony of the reality of our Savior. I was able to hold Asher as the men laid their hands on his head and and Kevin gave him a name and a blessing. It's been a long time now, and I don't remember all the words he spoke, but there was a powerful spirit in the room. I again felt honored to be Asher's mom. I invited whoever would like to, to take a minute to hold Asher and many did.<br />
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Now it's been over 2 years, and I'm here again attempting to finish this post.<br />
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As planned, my mom took the kids home, and everyone said their goodbyes. It was just Kevin and me there, with Amy graciously documenting these last moments of Asher's life. By this point, I was physically exhausted, mostly due to the effects of the blood loss. My milk had come in and that added another level of discomfort. Still, I cherished this intimate time with our tiny little son and again felt an overwhelming sense of love and gratitude for him. When we were ready, they gently removed Asher's breathing tube and gave him pain medication to keep him comfortable. We were unsure of how Asher's body would respond and were told sometimes people in Asher's situation will breath on their own for just a few minutes while others will breath for days before they pass away.<br />
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After getting a few pictures of Asher without the tube in, Amy left the room and it was just Kevin, Asher and me. It was so very tender. He breathed in gentle gasps every 7 seconds or so. We took turns holding him and cherishing every breath. The nurses would come in here and there to check him and administer more pain medication. All told, he breathed on his own for about an hour and we feel so blessed to have had that time with him. Toward the end, I layed on the bed with him nestled right in with me, just as I had imagined doing so often before he was born. It's one of my favorite things about new babies, that snuggling together when they're finally outside of your body. It's a thought that gets me through the final weeks of pregnancy, the reward I envision in the midst of labor. I let myself relax and just breath him in and it was like heaven. Then, after about 5 minutes, he breathed out the sweetest sigh, the kind that babies make after they've been crying and have been soothed. I've always loved that kind of sigh because it seems to indicate that everything is okay again, you've made everything better and that they're ready to move on with things. This was the last sound Asher made and I knew instantly that he was gone. It felt like such a tender mercy.<br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiAsjLGEV14oZ-yKz45FpysBSZsssE5BmFoNVqGVYz81j5M8cfdQpyvpA-pnCM9XMTFMCkIDkAGqMby-s4d7YjyUr2rhVVHDiAYCP9Sd4kuq3CJvebD9sVZL1UX4FAuQEqEwHmdrZ21oIW6GE_Pc525O8s6gFH6R2JBTpF8SVfUiSkC0trJ1fJU4qBm/s4032/IMG_0718.JPG" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4032" data-original-width="3024" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiAsjLGEV14oZ-yKz45FpysBSZsssE5BmFoNVqGVYz81j5M8cfdQpyvpA-pnCM9XMTFMCkIDkAGqMby-s4d7YjyUr2rhVVHDiAYCP9Sd4kuq3CJvebD9sVZL1UX4FAuQEqEwHmdrZ21oIW6GE_Pc525O8s6gFH6R2JBTpF8SVfUiSkC0trJ1fJU4qBm/s320/IMG_0718.JPG" width="240" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiq3RPEYdZBTm7rb_WLnOnKGRbfM2TpiAzwvaoN7Sj8smYYRpyObEydyEK7l8LTjkEgW8CVRBxh-8ES45L8XBXUjuRa5IXhu4bfIIPj5Dg75ImJ2DBMOblIJs4u01v-jD0PN5r3BJocpzS2DEJjUNen0l1B7pMfRp9_n1aJxhXaaTn63X3NJP6oS0E3/s5616/2016_08-larson1495.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="5616" data-original-width="3744" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiq3RPEYdZBTm7rb_WLnOnKGRbfM2TpiAzwvaoN7Sj8smYYRpyObEydyEK7l8LTjkEgW8CVRBxh-8ES45L8XBXUjuRa5IXhu4bfIIPj5Dg75ImJ2DBMOblIJs4u01v-jD0PN5r3BJocpzS2DEJjUNen0l1B7pMfRp9_n1aJxhXaaTn63X3NJP6oS0E3/s320/2016_08-larson1495.jpg" width="213" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgtNXQUV6lcwWnFXf6rY16f-0GdskkYEHc5biwYa1iJKPntE_1pSbz1phod115raZpjoeNWzAcJSIQd7ZbdNY7b9uA9DsafRXvxUEC__VBVJsoFDwWG3uD3I7aqq9NB4_P5YhzMWQY1uqeFy_3GIfbJZNUBkYMlUvDTQYvb8sqCp6QtsavmyrR6CrCv/s4032/IMG_0194.JPG" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4032" data-original-width="3024" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgtNXQUV6lcwWnFXf6rY16f-0GdskkYEHc5biwYa1iJKPntE_1pSbz1phod115raZpjoeNWzAcJSIQd7ZbdNY7b9uA9DsafRXvxUEC__VBVJsoFDwWG3uD3I7aqq9NB4_P5YhzMWQY1uqeFy_3GIfbJZNUBkYMlUvDTQYvb8sqCp6QtsavmyrR6CrCv/s320/IMG_0194.JPG" width="240" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div>
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There is nothing to describe the feeling of leaving the hospital without your baby. My physical capabilities were maxed out by this point and although the time we had with our Asher was beautiful and sacred, it was as emotionally exhausting as you might imagine it would be to say goodbye to your child. We laid him in his hospital bed and with tears pouring down my cheeks, Kevin wheelchaired me from the room. The staff at Primary Children's were amazing. As we left, a nurse with deep love and sympathy offered one last bit of advice. She encouraged us to be kind to each other as we each grieved and processed this loss in our own way. She urged us to be patient with each other and do our best to not take our emotions out on each other. Although at that moment we felt incredibly close to each other, I look back on this advice and see the wisdom in it because grief is a rough road. Kevin was then and always so tender and patient and kind to me. We felt incredible peace as we drove home that evening. Neighbors had brought over a huge bowl of watermelon and I'm sure I ate more than half of it.<br />
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Now, over 6 years since his birth, it's time to finish. The details have faded, so this will be brief. The following days were a blur. My incredible sister in law Nicole and Amy made all of the funeral arrangements. Kevin and I were able to go and dress his tiny, beautiful body in a sweet white outfit, complete with a hat and slippers made by an angel of a friend. It was tender and sacred to do so. </div><div><br /></div><div>Nick had flown in and Mikelle had driven up with her friend Tammie. Tammie had lost a baby and made the long drive so that I could have my sister there with me on that difficult day. Mikelle had already been there for the hospital stay and the blessing, so it was a real sacrifice to come back so soon, but it meant so much to me. Friends and family, ward members from both Lehi and Pleasant Grove all came to show of their love. It was beautiful and overwhelming to have so many people there. I felt so cared for. </div><div><br /></div><div>It was a graveside funeral held by the baby section of the Lehi cemetery. We gathered as a family around his casket at the back of the hearse to say our final goodbyes. We put the blanket my mom had made for him around him and let the kids put in some stuffed animals they wanted him to have. We also included a family picture as a reminder that we are an eternal family that he will always be a part of. We each said goodbye, then closed the casket for the last time. Kevin and the boys carried it to the front of the gathering and gently placed it in the designated spot. Each of the kids wrote letters to Asher to share. Kayla sang her song. Kevin spoke, I spoke, bishop Feveryear spoke. We released balloons, and it was over. </div><div><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiEFR1yntWHDnO68-VzboswjA626uP__u9Xc0pRNGPvvFI0LCoE-G02iDi13drNdcYW5rgJrl7VF9bbDPqaqMAgCe_1dtPMfhNMHRismPxfNA2Mqd5Y2WU_BMo295Du-M4f0JrmNLZyKYnevgtxhedMreRk7zsc9lA2aml9nZO7UjXhGUCpKngKdGsb/s2784/2016_08-larson1602.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1856" data-original-width="2784" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiEFR1yntWHDnO68-VzboswjA626uP__u9Xc0pRNGPvvFI0LCoE-G02iDi13drNdcYW5rgJrl7VF9bbDPqaqMAgCe_1dtPMfhNMHRismPxfNA2Mqd5Y2WU_BMo295Du-M4f0JrmNLZyKYnevgtxhedMreRk7zsc9lA2aml9nZO7UjXhGUCpKngKdGsb/s320/2016_08-larson1602.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjx1GYtJwnA1fbB_sdcv4j2dwhTjjsup8rvfMyqG5hVJs_LBIS1gVE-oEvo-yAWrheD8pOuTwxkTFUDltDWU3_oIsw3O4URL_osM11veZjKWqA3e_sRm6irn_U43fhlode3DC1YX1-d7gbV47WRb25NwnjXH4TE6ZrYPUoKR2x6mxYjXGc9qKR5PEDN/s2784/2016_08-larson1609.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; 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margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1856" data-original-width="2784" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimwrFJO9COg_nnxosjgSY4ASGYL2zXk0p_DL_m9SF7G9kbPu26HSQ0dQDKqJ38Sb9Vdl3Rzksz6b5lUwk1Bog-e70TlZFlY0497yQRUSPJIQuqD5LzeVOeNuTV2B_Fk4-tJGXYaMMulUAoFfKbZONUgM7ZA5K40iP62cq6nGmLbj6TnylCi7541Bu1/s320/2016_08-larson1675.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjd5t8DtnbnwoqqAC3eR4uLl2l9IOKJ1vF_g0FgN-Z-iUbQoxwjNkQ8x98HMea-WN1wdUYCcj6O8XZ0S9Lq7J713MvLcHHzkBChlNnb7sdc52rDzYvaBpd0NJAkHGmSPmT7zhkou_6lIPVVwYT0BZytfNccTv4_vPms0Z6ylIlUkhcOR0usBd7nJZoL/s2784/2016_08-larson1681.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1856" data-original-width="2784" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjd5t8DtnbnwoqqAC3eR4uLl2l9IOKJ1vF_g0FgN-Z-iUbQoxwjNkQ8x98HMea-WN1wdUYCcj6O8XZ0S9Lq7J713MvLcHHzkBChlNnb7sdc52rDzYvaBpd0NJAkHGmSPmT7zhkou_6lIPVVwYT0BZytfNccTv4_vPms0Z6ylIlUkhcOR0usBd7nJZoL/s320/2016_08-larson1681.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; 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margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1804" data-original-width="2706" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjDmFL4Mc67QL-tT-KgAcNJRgzsKHbuAEyHg0P6oVkNYh0ZELfmfJ3hydrqxSeKVyqY4csrt89oAmdOyoOk3Zge5G9Z9yma0TB429zA5YM8Hk4xDoAobHwJwQkPnzBMjd5CDVbt1HwQhsnuvGfd8bU97PdoUQTtCtq8UwUowqcxo7dOvXy876xb8bWB/s320/2016_08-larson1785.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhTa9_FSWYDPdCQKfHAZK-tWvlfrU5aXnOVjE2dE-o1aFAVKUFWonGhfWcKrqv4J7XiiaCZsVwPkNBSuxL7R9FLkTPdx80D4p6yfGtqjqIib-HchRaQcKwFwsBpx-SAGLRXpROfGqiYcr_UPE_n2uM0Yhm_YCgiUCXgaSTQiHUgD053tov5gnVm9rmy/s2784/2016_08-larson1839.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1856" data-original-width="2784" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhTa9_FSWYDPdCQKfHAZK-tWvlfrU5aXnOVjE2dE-o1aFAVKUFWonGhfWcKrqv4J7XiiaCZsVwPkNBSuxL7R9FLkTPdx80D4p6yfGtqjqIib-HchRaQcKwFwsBpx-SAGLRXpROfGqiYcr_UPE_n2uM0Yhm_YCgiUCXgaSTQiHUgD053tov5gnVm9rmy/s320/2016_08-larson1839.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; 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margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1856" data-original-width="2784" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi0xPqHfgcN1RQe65l7erd4fgdLZ0V7-rlMaeXyxs9x1lqmA6XHSSqabndqkxqDnJVT0GtRQlfP3ZL9iSfImz6BqzKVTXDe0OlgZ2-4KZU8nataADmhXPa6LpD7oRIG5c1vDrwYqb2Y-gvzE9K-cmrPI4iFjS4hhz4bpL1t7ELr9HNIdoPKqMd_u2eE/s320/2016_08-larson1743.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiedppJr_TWPOxO14QZz6eq84SkZRjK3X02d2A6ieNuZOV33WbfiXDP_WRvTr9PuRaiWuRUqVLpISUh3FXXUMy3qN0UeEvYdsfEmHVcjZFAcev3rAtEwF-LGfawFYDDOfPhgzkiYDeG9AnGH1QSRVuiloJlAPFL9icc4WkT_MIIE4H0osgGiCp8H4yv/s2784/2016_08-larson1800.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1856" data-original-width="2784" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiedppJr_TWPOxO14QZz6eq84SkZRjK3X02d2A6ieNuZOV33WbfiXDP_WRvTr9PuRaiWuRUqVLpISUh3FXXUMy3qN0UeEvYdsfEmHVcjZFAcev3rAtEwF-LGfawFYDDOfPhgzkiYDeG9AnGH1QSRVuiloJlAPFL9icc4WkT_MIIE4H0osgGiCp8H4yv/s320/2016_08-larson1800.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg5wHg3JmXv2tGQQ5tXG2eubYBzH1L9JfILDcl-JJJp_9myId5PIWBoS3zji-IXnW8yvfsm2_2q2z2aOO4DD7Dq3e2XvR08MWu1RefHLghJw02ySGvGAQUuwOe2RZiH50GnU-MeTFCq78GW6IZz2rEBljPGZPxrtXqzE6dEm71IhXHRBv-aeb2XPEIL/s2705/2016_08-larson1849.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1803" data-original-width="2705" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg5wHg3JmXv2tGQQ5tXG2eubYBzH1L9JfILDcl-JJJp_9myId5PIWBoS3zji-IXnW8yvfsm2_2q2z2aOO4DD7Dq3e2XvR08MWu1RefHLghJw02ySGvGAQUuwOe2RZiH50GnU-MeTFCq78GW6IZz2rEBljPGZPxrtXqzE6dEm71IhXHRBv-aeb2XPEIL/s320/2016_08-larson1849.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div>I had dreaded that day, the day I would put my infant into the ground. I didn’t know that I could bear it. I didn’t know what I could say. But when the day came, I woke up with a deep sense of peace. I had so much clarity on what I would say and the words seemed to flow onto the paper. It was miraculous. I felt like I had a physical hand on my back, navigating me through these things I had seriously questioned my ability to face, allowing me to help guide my children through some rough moments. I know that angels were there bearing me up. I felt so much love that day, from both sides of the veil. </div><div><br /></div><div>And that was the story of Asher’s life on earth. It changed me, that is for sure. His story didn't end with his death. The impact his brief life had on mine is incalculable. My grief reached depths I don't know how to describe. I felt so broken for so long. But looking back, I wouldn't change what happened. I still cry sometimes, but mostly I feel gratitude that I am his mom and gratitude for the lessons I learned, though they were hard won. My Savior, Jesus Christ, carried me through and I came to know him and feel his goodness in my most desperate moments. I know that because of Him, Asher is my son forever and that he is still very much part of our family. </div><div><br /></div>
Nataliehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12768195400316361623noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5928545399620364419.post-18993746406230287672023-05-25T23:46:00.001-07:002023-07-05T20:50:19.135-07:00 A reintroduction.<p><br /></p><p>I have a few drafts saved up that I never have published. One is entitled "Asher" and I've added to it with long breaks in between additions. Asher is our baby son who died the August after my last post. There were complications during his birth and he ultimately didn't survive. My post about him is long and detailed, but still incomplete. I will publish it when I feel I'm done with it. </p><p>Until then, let me catch you up on our family! The "Four Small Boys" who were the originals on this blog are growing up. Jack will be 18 next month, Taylor will be 17 in July, Noah 16 in September, and Austin is 14. Adam, whose birth was announced long ago in a post is 12, Jane is 10, and Caleb (still Cubby) is 8. </p><p>Asher would be turning 7 this year. It's crazy for me to consider that.</p><p>Lia is almost four and Ezra, our caboose, is 20 months. They are pretty awesome little humans and I'm excited to introduce them as pivotal players in this spotty little history. </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhaRpT-T3xzYptzLa6tWn1SSwkCN52H3xXpfR8EZE2zpTW_A_Ge2n7lfdS2gaT0ZDlZYjZZfax4Dn-x6HxWLnkCO_NKS6MBhPMOzpeLX-MVdYDowISRbpmL5GwS89lt-kqvh-Wou4dAZa1WO4t92m0rGr8TcSCcz8KMSfweGnv1m7kSbx2o5SsB7G4E/s3088/IMG_8320.HEIC" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="3088" data-original-width="2316" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhaRpT-T3xzYptzLa6tWn1SSwkCN52H3xXpfR8EZE2zpTW_A_Ge2n7lfdS2gaT0ZDlZYjZZfax4Dn-x6HxWLnkCO_NKS6MBhPMOzpeLX-MVdYDowISRbpmL5GwS89lt-kqvh-Wou4dAZa1WO4t92m0rGr8TcSCcz8KMSfweGnv1m7kSbx2o5SsB7G4E/s320/IMG_8320.HEIC" width="240" /></a></div><p></p><p>We moved 5 years ago, but not far. My parents moved in across the street 2 years ago, which was an incredible and unexpected blessing.</p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgItMn2u77ARAGrzeAuSQ-pNCrSNsZOW-07umvrjhNkbShAhcnJzjZPasDN2p3LOhxhpnjI5s6aFHOpavOt4-JfvbIfAmqh68FgnIIsQ3CkGtu5OX4XX1tzSsVfCSq3RnbhrFmWuejeTzftooZelyf3sFF5-ZprUO-AF6M7JZznq9HmZu-eu-NF93hx/s4032/IMG_6664.HEIC" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="3024" data-original-width="4032" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgItMn2u77ARAGrzeAuSQ-pNCrSNsZOW-07umvrjhNkbShAhcnJzjZPasDN2p3LOhxhpnjI5s6aFHOpavOt4-JfvbIfAmqh68FgnIIsQ3CkGtu5OX4XX1tzSsVfCSq3RnbhrFmWuejeTzftooZelyf3sFF5-ZprUO-AF6M7JZznq9HmZu-eu-NF93hx/s320/IMG_6664.HEIC" width="320" /></a></div><br /><p></p><p>Our life when I started this blog felt as demanding as can be. Kevin and I still look back on the year we had Austin as one of the hardest ever. We pretty much had 4 babies, with our boys being 3, 2, 1, and 0. Life now, though, is stretching in a different way. We have such a range of ages and so many unique personalities that we are trying to help navigate toward adulthood and various stages. I'm up late talking to my older ones, up in the night with Ezra and even Lia, then up and going to help my elementary kids get fed and out the door on time. Lia and Ez are usually up by then and my day is well underway.</p><p>As a way to sort of focus this "coming back" post, here are some of the things I love about each of my kids:<br /></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSUVoOCqBa8-NZ3xcZWH-PwhDC11k5GOdEMvNfZd2tt5H-YGSbO1PzaSt71Yytv4DmrZbSozpflWfXHuijQkgiMBsMQcqZwr7RTm5Epy7RzIYtf91TYzuYgj0OXhHsmfcPkHYcAJLlYS6OZ4831NdMGah0X1PD2Psc7zCoVQ6uH1dpll-hONbFWFYx/s1078/DSC_3644.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1078" data-original-width="811" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSUVoOCqBa8-NZ3xcZWH-PwhDC11k5GOdEMvNfZd2tt5H-YGSbO1PzaSt71Yytv4DmrZbSozpflWfXHuijQkgiMBsMQcqZwr7RTm5Epy7RzIYtf91TYzuYgj0OXhHsmfcPkHYcAJLlYS6OZ4831NdMGah0X1PD2Psc7zCoVQ6uH1dpll-hONbFWFYx/s320/DSC_3644.jpg" width="241" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b style="text-align: left;">Jack</b><span style="text-align: left;"> is loyal, compassionate, and disciplined. He is a hard worker and knows how to get a job done well. He balances school, a job, friends, a girlfriend, and family life and manages to be successful and happy. He's not gregarious, but he's a natural leader wherever he goes. He's a great singer and one of my favorite things is hearing him sing while he loads up the dishwasher.</span></div><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg3g1dEZYxcj8ieAkv4ZwRduMEeG29_JJqiVq7fP1SoaSrd6RB4IwqHlAPIExNNYokM8RGv1VJ2IiEV3YuWKjvXnREtVzamDKb1TqxMNj24JTOaefGc-blp2agOOpAv5UF5FR6KmESNBSgoa2GqfFGQ7qhIMpJjy76PBkYeTn4LiqDSYSne1R0PG1Xe/s2713/IMG_8427.HEIC" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2713" data-original-width="2034" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg3g1dEZYxcj8ieAkv4ZwRduMEeG29_JJqiVq7fP1SoaSrd6RB4IwqHlAPIExNNYokM8RGv1VJ2IiEV3YuWKjvXnREtVzamDKb1TqxMNj24JTOaefGc-blp2agOOpAv5UF5FR6KmESNBSgoa2GqfFGQ7qhIMpJjy76PBkYeTn4LiqDSYSne1R0PG1Xe/s320/IMG_8427.HEIC" width="240" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b style="text-align: left;">Taylor </b><span style="text-align: left;">is kind, grateful, low key and talented. He's taught himself the guitar and is pretty amazing, but he has yet to perform in any way, even for me! He's patient and loving with his youngest siblings. I love going for walks with him because he is so interesting to talk to. He just has great insights about life, but he's not one to volunteer his opinions so it takes some digging.</span></div><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiu0WUJQDr4WoMytl8zjOSN3iTv9Q7Y45O1eV09w1fVui4zVclHZi02DPFMNtd2OP1RS9kDkdSD_4b-w_d24zcp6Vh4SzoWrmuiY0O_y7tiply3mzIwSSx6vr9YF9unrPbsLpamd4VAD1XHUYssQ7ZLPlNhhbHWKZycFjmtQPu7eYK6xVbeqPmLx5YT/s4032/IMG_8857.HEIC" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4032" data-original-width="3024" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiu0WUJQDr4WoMytl8zjOSN3iTv9Q7Y45O1eV09w1fVui4zVclHZi02DPFMNtd2OP1RS9kDkdSD_4b-w_d24zcp6Vh4SzoWrmuiY0O_y7tiply3mzIwSSx6vr9YF9unrPbsLpamd4VAD1XHUYssQ7ZLPlNhhbHWKZycFjmtQPu7eYK6xVbeqPmLx5YT/s320/IMG_8857.HEIC" width="240" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b style="text-align: left;">Noah</b><span style="text-align: left;"> is all the good things. He's totally selfless and chronically cheerful. He's the one who makes sure we pray together each night and is usually the first one awake, making sure everyone is getting up. He makes things happen in his life and is pretty on the ball.</span></div><p></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgF0pbt9ml1qGuEoJg-4er5iGSZKUnsM7xzoVTkBz_uZROEyzLE_URP0NUei6xuXxZaZ2w5cz2_mtMfxMWyXF1C18KCRB-qcaNaTLYayvLtXAx5wvbqsLx0P81I-cKRLDWRUE_68zB0bSxTtW4g0vTiIQlhMYOFsdVJT6kKXXWeWH1YMBaAIyg4UlY2/s4032/IMG_8967.HEIC" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4032" data-original-width="3024" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgF0pbt9ml1qGuEoJg-4er5iGSZKUnsM7xzoVTkBz_uZROEyzLE_URP0NUei6xuXxZaZ2w5cz2_mtMfxMWyXF1C18KCRB-qcaNaTLYayvLtXAx5wvbqsLx0P81I-cKRLDWRUE_68zB0bSxTtW4g0vTiIQlhMYOFsdVJT6kKXXWeWH1YMBaAIyg4UlY2/s320/IMG_8967.HEIC" width="240" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b style="text-align: left;">Austin</b><span style="text-align: left;"> is organized, dependable, friendly and fun. He gets along with all his siblings, though he likes bantering a lot. He can organize a pantry like no other and although he is short, but compensates by being hard-working and competitive in sports. It's always fun watching him compete.</span></div><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg5EiNvhyPoolY2wdcch4UYQQl5DMvBwlvQJkn2E2gQxiIScunYnyN1BlziBH-9Q6yh-Fx88r6GDUjs1YK56pGVUkJgMPo2L12vuJ6N0q-I0cSfNH-js9njcLPY85YvxoSdW5iut3TFI9DkkYmAguzQB384rYrohyAUKOvu621FRYHq-BEKLL4xtQgj/s4032/IMG_8951.HEIC" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4032" data-original-width="3024" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg5EiNvhyPoolY2wdcch4UYQQl5DMvBwlvQJkn2E2gQxiIScunYnyN1BlziBH-9Q6yh-Fx88r6GDUjs1YK56pGVUkJgMPo2L12vuJ6N0q-I0cSfNH-js9njcLPY85YvxoSdW5iut3TFI9DkkYmAguzQB384rYrohyAUKOvu621FRYHq-BEKLL4xtQgj/s320/IMG_8951.HEIC" width="240" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b style="text-align: left;">Adam</b><span style="text-align: left;"> is funny, helpful, ambitious, and loving. Lia loves him so much because he has been such a kind and solicitous brother to her. He is incredibly creative and that manifests itself in the kitchen pretty often. He is a good friend and well-liked by others. He's always thinking about how he can earn money.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiB5NL2lH0Q31dObieiF4cApoUKCm_68gwPhUAOmrF05dRPYKH7x_QzKq5v2l6ja-T-r_R_NvDpz9XdqBvNM-zoFSAZE31Ss552oG37BOJTtjb5CyppJml7sIYQ1GP_w1gQaNUncWNOSEJMjTfXtiXoM5lCg3RcF4I90Am_f8SBUgQpyXN9X3daBDPN/s4032/IMG_7170.HEIC" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4032" data-original-width="3024" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiB5NL2lH0Q31dObieiF4cApoUKCm_68gwPhUAOmrF05dRPYKH7x_QzKq5v2l6ja-T-r_R_NvDpz9XdqBvNM-zoFSAZE31Ss552oG37BOJTtjb5CyppJml7sIYQ1GP_w1gQaNUncWNOSEJMjTfXtiXoM5lCg3RcF4I90Am_f8SBUgQpyXN9X3daBDPN/s320/IMG_7170.HEIC" width="240" /></a></div><b style="text-align: left;">Jane</b><span style="text-align: left;"> is sweet, happy, thoughtful and dynamic. She's got lots of friends and it's important to her that people don't feel left out. She comes up with fun activities, writes books and plays, is an enthusiastic supporter of plans that don't involve cleaning, and is the perfect big sister to Lia. When she found out Lia was going to be a girl she literally cried tears of joy.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj2rynZAxPCp1SpHnH3hsRJjbkxKE5GIAuOGJlmUYriHnv1po4d5PTYxw49ZP1V-A4E7o63YtTaVvmGo_VzLYlOjt4l26GbmyGRQshHk9eS2HOrW-OfJDriqwA5wSIUFsFO1lO5keaCnKdQ4VSbDOSl8yA-e0ked0-ncuXI5KKaCwXITkGWjxA2Yvb9/s4032/IMG_8196.HEIC" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4032" data-original-width="3024" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj2rynZAxPCp1SpHnH3hsRJjbkxKE5GIAuOGJlmUYriHnv1po4d5PTYxw49ZP1V-A4E7o63YtTaVvmGo_VzLYlOjt4l26GbmyGRQshHk9eS2HOrW-OfJDriqwA5wSIUFsFO1lO5keaCnKdQ4VSbDOSl8yA-e0ked0-ncuXI5KKaCwXITkGWjxA2Yvb9/s320/IMG_8196.HEIC" width="240" /></a></div><b style="text-align: left;">Cubby</b><span style="text-align: left;"> is smart, engaging, happy, and driven. He is a bit of a teaser at the moment, and can be tenacious when he wants something, but overall he's really pleasant to live with. He's quick to apologize and easy to teach. I love playing games with him because he catches on quickly and usually ends up winning.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh7ONHzHxsCq10H6w44e7kEXG-kVwgUVnEiiiiy6jmBZ_0B-_6IWwKkvVN-lfHliThkTaAtdTPSq5tiiPbtaeRjPLxxUR-E6uRWmmIPEnq6Mf6jIk-fI0DJunVF7MSQX28oeiTAfR7EE03W77X0Q475STglwsakLGkDTtAUoqd1cxNq10mWFyVeoo3j/s4032/IMG_8804.HEIC" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4032" data-original-width="3024" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh7ONHzHxsCq10H6w44e7kEXG-kVwgUVnEiiiiy6jmBZ_0B-_6IWwKkvVN-lfHliThkTaAtdTPSq5tiiPbtaeRjPLxxUR-E6uRWmmIPEnq6Mf6jIk-fI0DJunVF7MSQX28oeiTAfR7EE03W77X0Q475STglwsakLGkDTtAUoqd1cxNq10mWFyVeoo3j/s320/IMG_8804.HEIC" width="240" /></a></div><b style="text-align: left;">Lia</b><span style="text-align: left;"> is pretty magical. She has a strong little personality that was a mix of sweet and sour not long ago, but is far more sweet now. She is enthusiastic and imaginative. She LOVES babies. She is so kind and caring toward Ezra. She is very talkative and says funny and cute and weird things constantly. </span></div><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; font-weight: bold; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjjIUelRPBysnu8YWLnX-iV8Pbo0SoNaTShnPHzGWvgwfS14uUH6OJYzunh9g_qNGD79KvQMDDt-44jsXcEpY0vb-rctfdYOEibS_bLNLLzvBGYAwjXAZoaEp4oPqjsrA_gojNJy1XojgyUsalZ6HhfgMDTVYZdueEkSkzvGTj9akc2NJKYTjeCj9Ms/s4032/IMG_8789.HEIC" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4032" data-original-width="3024" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjjIUelRPBysnu8YWLnX-iV8Pbo0SoNaTShnPHzGWvgwfS14uUH6OJYzunh9g_qNGD79KvQMDDt-44jsXcEpY0vb-rctfdYOEibS_bLNLLzvBGYAwjXAZoaEp4oPqjsrA_gojNJy1XojgyUsalZ6HhfgMDTVYZdueEkSkzvGTj9akc2NJKYTjeCj9Ms/s320/IMG_8789.HEIC" width="240" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b style="font-weight: bold; text-align: left;">Ezra</b><span style="text-align: left;"> is far less talkative. He is mostly quiet and can't be bothered to say words most of the time, though he knows a handful. He is very expressive with his emotions though. He beams when he's happy, pouts out his lip when he's sad, furrows his brows when he's angry, shakes when he's excited. Mostly, though, he's chill and content. He is a light and a joy and we're so happy he's ours.</span></div><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5CubAE9OtJZFNIzW-jI3i8TKKNmdO5RsM3d9PBemrmQn7DUviJCLZl6RCghlHf8LF-pdF4ltCuFjqbGzQuIlbUFSa-M0juK1vQcTPkKBxgOwjxATWxNG0Rp9MBf33mzAUi7j0efyPpM3SsJEiKAe_y4GIHe_oMVaGR0DsByjt3p9LWwDW6_AYrdl9/s4032/IMG_2264.HEIC" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4032" data-original-width="3024" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5CubAE9OtJZFNIzW-jI3i8TKKNmdO5RsM3d9PBemrmQn7DUviJCLZl6RCghlHf8LF-pdF4ltCuFjqbGzQuIlbUFSa-M0juK1vQcTPkKBxgOwjxATWxNG0Rp9MBf33mzAUi7j0efyPpM3SsJEiKAe_y4GIHe_oMVaGR0DsByjt3p9LWwDW6_AYrdl9/s320/IMG_2264.HEIC" width="240" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="text-align: left;">Our dog, Toto, died of old age earlier this year. She was a great dog and it was sad for all of us. We technically have a pet bunny, though he just roams around our property and we never hold him or even bother to chase him anymore. Last month we saw him in the yard and were watching him when another bunny came hopping out, too! We've since seen that bunny a lot, so I guess we "have" 2 bunnies now. Jack has a goldfish. And we currently have 16 4-week-old chicks. We'll see how that goes.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjRz4veey5mTEv7Aly1Ro9jht1_RljEKJGSth-NUrn7n67HSelTGS1J51CkPCvgr8nFknRoTJbiYFSLRAc0nfz51YT8CvRPHsTODQblb9cm8Lfi6GH22zQOHS2w0VOP1YfSLPV1xyeJx-dSBajbCwfM1cRZ51Sb2DTpMUOweoGHG5L5Klw0CMvpTgyV/s3088/IMG_7764.HEIC" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="3088" data-original-width="2316" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjRz4veey5mTEv7Aly1Ro9jht1_RljEKJGSth-NUrn7n67HSelTGS1J51CkPCvgr8nFknRoTJbiYFSLRAc0nfz51YT8CvRPHsTODQblb9cm8Lfi6GH22zQOHS2w0VOP1YfSLPV1xyeJx-dSBajbCwfM1cRZ51Sb2DTpMUOweoGHG5L5Klw0CMvpTgyV/s320/IMG_7764.HEIC" width="240" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Kevin and I are going strong...though his back is pretty weak and my neck has issues. Haha:) With Ezra being nearly 2 and our last, I feel like I am coming into new territory. I'm neither expecting a baby nor grieving a loss. There's space there that there hasn't ever been before, though I'm not sure for what. Maybe this? We'll see. <span style="text-align: left;">Kevin is still self-employed as a financial planner and recently bought part of a building. He is officing with people he really enjoys and generally loving life, as is his nature. </span></div></div><p>So, there it is. Our big old family in a wordy nutshell. </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiDXhKCcz_X73vIeNkFBNfuxAMqQA7gR6HDhdrMIIbCHZTbZ1ZDSrEWh2Eia9DxUVpxl5chwnT9YOBaBlyE0-sVhxNTkLGQqDhKhl7RY2CWFE4SjMrj4-e2QDatT6_iv-abdC9gIsTDkPatNcYoIfaD37zGPONjE9o2NB2aNE6e2gWatDUdHUc0XhPH/s4032/IMG_8907.HEIC" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4032" data-original-width="3024" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiDXhKCcz_X73vIeNkFBNfuxAMqQA7gR6HDhdrMIIbCHZTbZ1ZDSrEWh2Eia9DxUVpxl5chwnT9YOBaBlyE0-sVhxNTkLGQqDhKhl7RY2CWFE4SjMrj4-e2QDatT6_iv-abdC9gIsTDkPatNcYoIfaD37zGPONjE9o2NB2aNE6e2gWatDUdHUc0XhPH/s320/IMG_8907.HEIC" width="240" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">The boys</div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4xApy5uoH36tN3TINR0dfKD1MO6Ma7EfsxeOb0_3rTPm_XOvOA610BItE-M0K45Yz0Npb4NJbKdGmAEVvPyBE3yRWMTU6wGdBQcjP258CnEHwTItXfdv_3k3J5nhHeK21vI4V9bPLWMKkWrOI4dmLNgofksbxVj-8DX91hhtZn7iE0-kMcPQtZFO3/s4032/IMG_8023.HEIC" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4032" data-original-width="3024" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4xApy5uoH36tN3TINR0dfKD1MO6Ma7EfsxeOb0_3rTPm_XOvOA610BItE-M0K45Yz0Npb4NJbKdGmAEVvPyBE3yRWMTU6wGdBQcjP258CnEHwTItXfdv_3k3J5nhHeK21vI4V9bPLWMKkWrOI4dmLNgofksbxVj-8DX91hhtZn7iE0-kMcPQtZFO3/s320/IMG_8023.HEIC" width="240" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">The girls</div>Nataliehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12768195400316361623noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5928545399620364419.post-69085998502798757122016-05-11T22:16:00.001-07:002016-05-11T22:16:53.537-07:00My February March April May postOnce a week has proven a bit too much to attempt, so maybe I'll lower my expectations to once every other month or so :/ It does make it harder to focus on the everyday this way, though. Broad strokes covering the major highlights of our life are good, but not what I love to write about. So, brief overview first, then maybe some of the things our days are made of if I can get to that.<br />
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I'm 25 weeks along with another little boy! I laughed and shook my head when I saw on the ultrasound screen clear evidence that HE would be our seventh son. I have no sadness over this, as much as I love my girl and would love to have another. I also love my boys and am thrilled to welcome this sweet son into our family in August. It is amusing, though. All. these. boys.<br />
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This baby and Caleb will be 18 months apart. I'll be honest and say he's coming sooner than I had planned on. The beginning of this pregnancy had me feeling overwhelmed. I always feel sooo wiped out at first. Not sick, but such low energy. Because I thought I for sure wasn't pregnant for the first few weeks I kept wondering what in the world my deal was. Caleb was a rotten sleeper and I was up often with him, but I had been handling that okay for months. Suddenly, I had NO motivation and it felt like I was just dragging through each day. It felt like my blood turned to thick molasses, making every movement slow and hard. When I sat or laid down that molasses would ooze into whatever I was slumped upon making it a huge task to get up and going again. Then, upon hearing my symptoms, Nicole insisted that I take a test right away. It was positive and I felt some relief that at least I could explain my absolute sluggishness. Even knowing why I felt that way, I still struggled. Looking back, I can see that the newness and unexpectedness of the news combined with the exhausted and hormonal physical challenges made this pregnancy and the addition of a baby seem incredibly daunting. I was excited, but I felt very inadequate.<br />
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On the 12 week mark almost to the day, my energy returned. It felt miraculous and I was able to see the landscape of my life through a better lens, a more realistic one, really. I would be adding another child to our family, yes. And that thought wasn't so hard because I would actually be a functioning person if the baby wasn't inside of me. I had allowed my first trimester self to project that I would feel the same exhaustion I feel during the first part of pregnancy, still have to meet the needs of my other seven children, and be up all night and day caring for a new baby. Not so. Pregnancy exhaustion and new baby sleep deprivation are two very different things. I know how to be pretty sleep deprived and still live a mostly normal, happy life. I can deal with lack of sleep. AND we'll love this baby, which will make it all easier.<br />
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Goodnight, so much for broad strokes. Well, to sum up everything else...The older kids are finishing up the school year, Jack is doing choir, Taylor started piano lessons and seems to have a real knack for it, the three older boys are all in scouts, and they'll all be doing swimming lessons in a few weeks. Adam does an online preschool program every day and is just on the cusp of reading. He and Jane have some good little friends and we often do playgroups during the week. We spent a few weeks working with Caleb to help him sleep better, and now he's a champ (no crying it out involved! yay!) so we're getting good sleep. Kevin is busy at work, and things are going well there.<br />
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Easter</div>
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Mother's Day (where's Adam??)</div>
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Mikelle and Nicole both had twins, so I'm a new aunt 4 times over. Nicole's girls, Lucy and Macy, are miracle preemie babies that actually come home tomorrow! I cannot wait to meet them in person. They've been in my heart and prayers for months and months. I was able to be there with Mikelle for the births of Maple and Jameson, and that was amazing! They are all beautiful babies! My brother Seth just got married to Lizzy Pratt last month. Our entire family minus my 4 sweet nieces in Germany were able to come and it was just so so great to see and celebrate with everyone. Lizzy is actually Nadine's youngest sister, and she fits into our family so well. She and Seth went to Dallas for internships but will be back to BYU in the fall. Yay! Brian is down here working and we see him almost weekly. It's been so great to get to know him better. He's smart and easy going and positive and fun to be around. My mom went down to be with Mikelle after the babies were born, then came up for the wedding, then stayed another week with me and we went to women's conference together! I was SO great to spend that time together. She helped me get on top of my life again, and I feel renewed in every way. <br />
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Jane meeting Maple</div>
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Seth and Lizzy with their MANY nieces and nephews at the reception</div>
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As for the details, maybe I'll get a chance to get to those soon. Kevin is taking some pretty intense classes toward his CFP right now and in the next few months, so there will be more time in my evenings to do stuff other than hanging out with him since he has to study. Sorry, though, blog. You're not a great replacement. You'll do, but I love him a lot. He works hard both at work and at home and lately I can see him changing for the better in subtle ways. It's hard to put my finger on it, but it's there and I'm impressed with who he's becoming. Don't get me wrong, I've always been impressed with him, but he's getting even better and I think that's worth noting.<br />
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It's 11 now. I'm shutting down. :)Nataliehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12768195400316361623noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5928545399620364419.post-6567488084219630802016-01-27T08:01:00.001-08:002016-01-27T08:09:13.242-08:00Caleb Comes!Disclaimer: It has almost been a year since Caleb joined our family, and I can probably count on one hand the number of times I've gotten more than 4 hours of sleep in a stretch. So, dear Cabes, if this account lacks detail because my brain is a little foggy, resist the temptation to find in this a reason to feel slighted. Instead see this muddled account as golden proof of my devotion to you and your constant well-being, day and (especially) night, for months on end.<br />
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It took me a long time to settle on a midwife for Caleb's delivery. After Jane's <a href="http://natalielarson.blogspot.com/2012/07/welcoming-jane.html">beautiful home birth</a>, I was excited to have a similar experience this time around. Because we had moved further away, my midwife for Jane (and my miscarried pregnancies) felt it best that I find someone closer. It made sense, but I was disappointed and still a little broken from the miscarriages, so I put off the task for way too long. I found one in December, and although it didn't seem like the best fit, it really was too late to change. </div>
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She was a very good, kind person. I can definitely see how many people would just adore her. She would talk to Caleb in my belly and had a strong feeling that his birth would be wonderful. She was dedicated and very knowledgeable when it came to herbs and natural things. Any ailment or symptom I had could be alleviated with some kind of herb or goat's whey or diet change. She is good at what she does, very passionate. But I really just wanted to take TUMS without being made to feel like I was ruining my placenta. I wanted someone to tell me I had the blood pressure of a 7 year old, and a blood type that loves babies, and that it might help to try upping my water intake in a way that didn't feel like I was in trouble, all things Rebecca, my previous midwife, had done.<br />
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Really, I just wanted to have someone who saw my life full of children and recognized that this pregnancy was very important, but that I had so many things to focus on, and I didn't need another reason to feel like I was failing. My baby was growing and nothing was going wrong. I just needed that to be enough. This midwife had been unable to have children, and had made natural birth and living her passion. I had not. I just liked having Jane at home and wanted to do that again. I wasn't driven by a hatred of hospitals, doctors, or medication, or by a love of all things holistic and natural. I just liked the peaceful feeling that had accompanied Jane's entrance into the world. So while I appreciated her knowledge, I generally left our visits feeling worse than before.<br />
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She had two apprentices, and while I liked them both, this caused it's own sort of distress for me. About 3.5 weeks before my due date, labor really started. I'd had babies this early before, and Caleb was measuring big, so I was excited! I labored for about an hour as the contractions grew more intense. Because Jane had arrived so quickly, I wanted to make sure the midwife had enough time to get to our house. When I was SURE things were progressing, I had Kevin make the call. My midwife said she'd head over and that the assistants might arrive before she did. Within 15 minutes, my labor stopped completely. I'm not sure why, but it really felt like my discomfort with my midwife and my guilt over dragging 3 people out of their beds and away from their families caused me enough stress to just stop labor cold. And that happened twice. It made for a long last few weeks of pregnancy. <br />
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I took several pictures there at the end, hopeful that each one would be the last.<br />
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Turns out, this was my last one, taken just a few hours before his birth, though I didn't know it at the time. My current house has awesome carpet and SO. MANY. MIRRORS. Every closet door, several in each bathroom, even an entire wall of my room (exciting, right? ;) ), so as a result, you can see the birth tub in the angle on the right in this picture.<br />
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I can't say that I didn't have any clue that Caleb was coming when I took this, though I wasn't having contractions yet. That morning I was stressed, just a little bit. My mom had already bought tickets to come for 5 day...I think arriving on the 11th, though I'm not certain about that. I just know that it was coming up, and I was worried she'd miss the baby entirely. I was due on the 14th, and as I said earlier, I'd had a lot of labor, but none for several days. SO...I was worried and stressed and tired. I just wanted peace and I knelt and prayed for it the morning of the ninth. I prayed that I could stop worrying, that I could let go of trying to control the situation. I immediately opened my scriptures and read this verse in the Book of Mormon, in 3rd Nephi Chaper 1:</div>
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<span class="verse" style="background-position: 0px 0px; border: 0px; color: #333333; font-family: "palatino" , "palatino linotype" , "pahoran" , "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 18px; line-height: 25.2px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">12 </span><span style="background-color: rgba(255 , 255 , 255 , 0.00784314); color: #333333; font-family: "palatino" , "palatino linotype" , "pahoran" , "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 18px; line-height: 25.2px;">And it came to pass that he cried mightily unto the Lord</span><span style="background-color: rgba(255 , 255 , 255 , 0.00784314); color: #333333; font-family: "palatino" , "palatino linotype" , "pahoran" , "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 18px; line-height: 25.2px;"> </span><span style="background-color: rgba(255 , 255 , 255 , 0.00784314); color: #333333; font-family: "palatino" , "palatino linotype" , "pahoran" , "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 18px; line-height: 25.2px;">all</span><span style="background-color: rgba(255 , 255 , 255 , 0.00784314); color: #333333; font-family: "palatino" , "palatino linotype" , "pahoran" , "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 18px; line-height: 25.2px;"> </span><span style="background-color: rgba(255 , 255 , 255 , 0.00784314); color: #333333; font-family: "palatino" , "palatino linotype" , "pahoran" , "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 18px; line-height: 25.2px;">that day; and behold, the</span><span style="background-color: rgba(255 , 255 , 255 , 0.00784314); color: #333333; font-family: "palatino" , "palatino linotype" , "pahoran" , "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 18px; line-height: 25.2px;"> </span><span style="background-color: rgba(255 , 255 , 255 , 0.00784314); color: #333333; font-family: "palatino" , "palatino linotype" , "pahoran" , "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 18px; line-height: 25.2px;">voice</span><span style="background-color: rgba(255 , 255 , 255 , 0.00784314); color: #333333; font-family: "palatino" , "palatino linotype" , "pahoran" , "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 18px; line-height: 25.2px;"> </span><span style="background-color: rgba(255 , 255 , 255 , 0.00784314); color: #333333; font-family: "palatino" , "palatino linotype" , "pahoran" , "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 18px; line-height: 25.2px;">of the Lord came unto him, saying:</span></div>
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<a class="bookmark-anchor dontHighlight" href="https://www.blogger.com/null" name="13" style="background: 0px 0px; border: 0px; color: #0091bc; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> </a><span class="verse" style="background: 0px 0px; border: 0px; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">13 </span>Lift up your head and be of good cheer; for behold, the time is at hand, and on this night shall the sign be given, and on the morrow come I into the world, to show unto the world that I will fulfil all that which I have caused to be spoken by the mouth of my holy prophets.</div>
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I hope this doesn't sound sacrilegious, because I know this verse is about the Savior, but it spoke peace to my soul. I felt like I knew that my son was coming and that I could just enjoy these last few...hours, days...I wasn't sure how literally to take the scripture, but I did feel at ease. I did enjoy that day. I remember reading with Adam and Jane, doing a little laundry, talking to my mom and sisters about my hopes for a baby "on the morrow" and just relaxing about the whole situation. </div>
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Well, in that picture up there it was bedtime, and I didn't know what to think. I hadn't felt a single contraction and it was after 10. The kids were all soundly sleeping, so we went to bed, but I couldn't relax and I let myself get worried again. I went out at around 11:20 and started walking up and down our stairs. After about 5 reps and no progress, I leaned against the wall, feeling discouraged. But the scripture, "be still, and know that I am God." came to mind. I felt peaceful again and went back to bed. At about 11:45, I had a strong contraction. Yay! Then...nothing. Nothing. I prayed for more peace, and it was quickly granted. I fell asleep within a few minutes. Then, at 12:20, I woke up to another strong contraction, and my water broke!</div>
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Kevin called the midwife and began filling the birth tub. My contractions came hard and close from then on. Kevin was my person, helping me through the contractions and giving encouragement. We felt like a team to me. When Jane was born, he was focused on blowing up and filling the tub, and I just did my thing, calling him to help when I really needed it. This time, we were more prepared, and we had a little more time, so he was with me and I loved it. The midwife and assistants all arrived at around 1:12, but it was a few minutes before I wanted them to come in to my room. I was just really focused and didn't want to talk to anyone. </div>
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They came in and I felt like I wanted to get in the tub. I did and one of the assistants listened to the baby's heart between contractions. She wanted me to tell her when another contraction came, so she could hear how the baby was doing during contractions. One started almost immediately, and I told her, but I couldn't stay still. It was very strong and I needed to turn onto my knees. It didn't let up, and I suddenly felt very irrational. My thoughts were something like "I can't do this, I hate this, why do I have to do this? I'm done. I can't do this!" Then, I pushed. Caleb's head came out with one push and it took everyone a few seconds to realize it. I was still in my own zone, but could hear them say, Oh, there's the head! I just wanted to be done, so whether they were ready or not, I pushed again, and out slid the rest of him, into Kevin's waiting arms, as it turns out. It was 1:19 am.</div>
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I heard him cry before I saw him and I can't describe my relief. He was alive, and breathing! In all those months of pregnancy, I had worried so very much. I honestly was shocked when they put a healthy, fat, red Caleb in my arms. I looked him over, basically amazed that he was completely fine, but he was. At 8 pounds 10 ounces, he was a full pound bigger than my next biggest baby. He had fuzzy dark hair, another surprise. We got out of the tub and quickly settled into bed. </div>
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He just seemed so robust and healthy, and I cried tears of gratitude and disbelief. My soul seemed to heal immediately. The midwife and assistants cleaned everything up, I think they made us a smoothie. They gave Caleb a full examination and everything was great. Honestly, it was a blur. A happy blur. In the weeks before Caleb's arrival, I'd lay in my bed and picture him nestled next to me, and here he was, just as I'd pictured. He was so familiar to me, even in those first moments. </div>
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They eventually left. We marveled. We slept. Our kids woke up to a new brother! Friends and family rallied around to celebrate, and to make us feel comfortable and loved. My friend Amy came with dinner and a quilt and took pictures of all of us, but they aren't on this computer. Such treasures that I will share when I get them switched over. Here's one:</div>
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Kevin's sister, Julie, took Adam and Jane for hours and Nicole picked Austin up from Kindergarten and kept him so we could rest while the other boys were at school. Mikelle surprised me by driving the 4 hours up from Kanab and arrived in the afternoon. </div>
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The only rough thing was that I had no prescription medication to help ease the afterbirth pain, and it was excruciating for the first 2-3 days. Worse than labor, except for maybe the last 2 minutes. I was so grateful for all of the help during that time so I didn't have to do anything but stay in bed with my sweet baby. The heating pad was my best friend, but when I would nurse Caleb, sometimes the cramping was so intense I'd have to quickly put him down and curl into a ball to try to cope. That, I remember clearly. ;) </div>
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My mom arrived on the eleventh (double checked in Kevin's journal) and was so helpful, as always. No one loves babies like she does and it's been a treasure to share each of mine with her. </div>
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And from there, the days seem to run together. It took us about a week to settle on a name, in the end it was between Henry and Caleb. We tried Henry first and it felt forced and didn't seem to be the right one. Then we tried Caleb and it was immediately comfortable and just felt like it was who he was. Like I said, He's most often Cabes, Cabey, Cubs, or Cubby to us now, but I love the name Caleb as well. We love him so much and feel so blessed to have him as our lucky number 7!</div>
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Nataliehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12768195400316361623noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5928545399620364419.post-25191539656721866452016-01-07T16:19:00.000-08:002016-01-07T23:44:07.253-08:00Words for LossCaleb's arrival marked the definitive end to a hard period of time for me, and I feel I need to address that before I can explain my feelings surrounding his birth. The reason this blog was entirely abandoned for so long was that I didn't know how to write about my miscarriages, but didn't think I could just write as if they didn't happen. I had two between Jane and Caleb. The first at 11 weeks and the second at 20. <br />
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My first miscarriage started as a pregnancy I wasn't exactly trying for. Jane and that baby would have been 17 months apart, so not crazy by my standards, just sooner than I was planning. It took a few days to process it, then I was just excited. The weeks of the first trimester seem to take forever, and I was almost done with them, but when I went in for my first appointment at 11 weeks, it was clear something was wrong. The baby was measuring so small and the little heartbeat was steady but very slow. There was nothing to do but wait for an inevitable miscarriage. It was an awful 5 days, knowing the baby was slowly dying and I could do nothing. When it was over, I felt on the fence about having another baby soon. The pregnancy had helped me get excited about the thought of another, but the loss left me sad and a little disoriented.<br />
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After about 4 months, we tried again and I was pregnant right away. I was happy, but scared. I held my breath at my 10 week appointment, but all was well. It was such a relief! At 14.5 weeks we went to the mall to find out the gender of our baby. 100% boy! He was measuring just right and moving all over. We had all of the kids with us, and had made a deal that if it was a girl we'd get ice cream and if it was a boy we'd get doughnuts. Doughnuts it was! We went to Harmon's and bought a box, then went to their upstairs dining area and divvied them up. It was a fun memory. :)<br />
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My next appointment with my midwife was at 20 weeks. It was on Valentines Day. Kevin was sick, so I left Jane and Adam napping with him and brought Austin and Noah with me. I was excited to see our little guy again, but...there was no heartbeat. She did an ultrasound and our little boy wasn't moving. He was gone. He'd died at least a few weeks earlier. My midwife was very kind, explaining some options I had. It was all a blur. I told her I'd talk to Kevin and call her when I got home.<br />
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I couldn't bring myself to call anyone. I was so so sad. I packed my little boys into the car and drove the 25 minutes home sobbing. Noah, who was 6, asked what was wrong. I told him our baby had died and that it made me really sad. Kevin was as shocked as I was. There were decisions to be made about how to get the baby out. I could take cytotech, and basically go into labor and deliver him at home. I could go to the hospital, and possibly get a d&c. I prayed for discernment and felt very peaceful about staying at home. Danny and Nicole came and picked up all of our kids. My midwife sent a prescription for the cytotech and Kevin picked it up along with some dinner for us. We enjoyed the time alone together before the contractions started. It was hard, but I think we both felt a lot of peace that night. Our little son was born within a few hours. We got to hold his little body and marvel at his perfect fingers and toes.<br />
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There were no complications, and physically I healed very quickly. Emotionally, it took longer. I felt pretty numb for a while, then anti-social. I lost some of my zest for life and it took a long time before I felt like myself again. I had always thought it would be fairly easy to recover from that kind of thing. But it all hit me harder than I would have expected. I didn't understand the losses, the second one especially. I wasn't bitter, but I wasn't turning to the Lord for strength either. I was just going along and some days were harder than others, but I just sort of floated through things, breaking down from time to time. I never doubted that the Lord was aware of me, or that this was part of His plan, but I was very halfhearted in my attempts to connect with Him. I regret this, but have since felt that He understood and didn't hold it against me. I think I could have spared myself some pain, though, if I'd allowed Him to help more.<br />
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All was not misery between my first miscarriage and Caleb's birth. We went on some wonderful trips, and my day to day life was full of children whose happiness was contagious. There were many, many joyful moments. I do wish I'd been better at recording them.<br />
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I was pregnant with Caleb 3 months after the second miscarriage, and I worried about him all the time. I was sure something would go wrong with the pregnancy or that he wouldn't be healthy after he was born. We moved about 20 minutes away during that pregnancy (another post waiting to happen) and I had to find a new midwife. I put it off forever, I think I was functioning under that attitude that no news was good news and worried that an appointment would bring bad news. Caleb was soothing to me, though, even in the womb. If I EVER feared that something was wrong, he would move, as if to reassure me that he was fine. I felt a bond with him and prayed that all would be well. So many prayers that all would be okay.<br />
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And it was!<br />
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Next post: Cubby's Birth StoryNataliehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12768195400316361623noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5928545399620364419.post-35813252135516620222016-01-04T22:38:00.003-08:002016-01-04T22:55:04.347-08:00Meet CabesInspired by my friend, <a href="http://www.joyinourposterity.com/2016/01/week-1.html">Courtney</a>, who was inspired by our friend, <a href="http://thoserobertsons.blogspot.com/">Diane</a>, I am going to attempt to post at least once a week this year. Whew! It's a lofty goal for me, but it's time to come back to life. <br />
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First things first: An Introduction!<br />
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Caleb James joined our family on a cold dark night in February, 2015. February 10th. He was my biggest baby by a pound, and I really should dedicate a full post to his birth, but not yet. This is just a quick catch up. So, without further ado...Caleb!<br />
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The last one was taken just yesterday. He's almost 11 months now and is walking all over! He's brought so much happiness to our family and all of his siblings think he's just the best baby in the world. He knows how to cheer up even the crankiest brother or console the saddest sister. They simply can't help but smile when he's around and he seems to really be aware of their feelings. <br />
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Personally, I love this sweet boy with all my heart. He soothes my soul. He's smart and busy, but also peaceful and content. And he has BROWN hair! It's not <i>dark </i>brown, but it's the darkest we've had. It's funny seeing him with Jane. She's so fair and petite and he's big and dark. She'll take his hands and walk backwards all over the house, leading him from room to room faster than he could go on his own. He'll go along with her schemes.<br />
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I should say, we rarely call him Caleb. It's almost always Cabes, Cabey, Cubby, or Cubs. And his only real downside is that he only like sleeping in my arms, and even then not very soundly. He likes to nurse OFTEN. And frankly, I'm too tired to <i>not </i>nurse him when he wakes up, so he'll eat, then settle back into his favorite spot. </div>
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This was just this morning...and there are many more just like it.</div>
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But as tired as I am, I still find it endearing. He likes to be close, and I can't say that's a bad thing. So if I make no sense sometimes, just know I'm sleep deprived, but it's for a good cause.:) It keeps him happy. and chubby.</div>
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We're so grateful he's part of our family, and he seems pretty happy to be here.</div>
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(and, yes. It has been over 2.5 years since my last post... :/ )</div>
Nataliehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12768195400316361623noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5928545399620364419.post-77015805265248818702013-05-07T13:28:00.004-07:002013-05-07T20:20:04.187-07:00impatienceJust a few more weeks of school and then we'll be free! I love that thought and have been counting down for some time now...like since January. It's not <i>just </i>because I tire of the daily disruption of picking them up. I genuinely like having them here. with me. It's going to be a good summer, too. We are building a tree house of sorts (well, Kevin is) and I can't wait for it to be done so my boys can get adventuring in it. Here's where it stands right now:<br />
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That tube there on the bottom left is going to be an awesome slide. I think Kev will finish the floor this week, then on to the railing and ladder. I think we'll enclose the bottom and make it a sandbox. It's taking a long time, weeks and weeks...I just can't wait because I'm so excited! I wish we had a good branch for attaching some kind of tire swing...maybe we'll figure something out.</div>
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For mother's day I've asked for a fence =) Our yard is fenced, but not enclosed on the sides of our house. It's something we just keep meaning to do, but haven't done. We can't decide if we should hire someone, or just do it ourselves (kevin's self). Kev is feeling particularly handy lately thanks to the tree house, and I do think he can totally handle it. I just don't know if I can handle the <i>time</i> it will probably take. I've heard that when it comes to this sort of thing people want things done well, done fast, and done cheap...but you can only ever have two out of the three. I can tell Kevin wants to do it, so that is probably what will happen. I'll just have to remind myself that I asked for it when I don't see him for 3 Saturdays in a row. How much is it worth to just have it done in 4 hours? Oh, so tempting...</div>
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Despite all of this home improvement, I'm starting to really feel the desire to move. I love my house. I love so many things about my house. I just dream of more land. Our friends are moving left and right and houses are selling quickly in our area for good prices. It's made me itchy. I'm content to stay for now, happy even. But I can't help it if my fingers keep typing in utahrealestate.com each time I sit down to my computer...I just can't help it.</div>
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I didn't start this post with a theme, but I see it. I'm impatiently counting down the days until summer, I want a tree house and I want it <i>now</i>, and a fence <i>now</i>, and I want land <i>now. </i>Do you think maybe I could use some patience? </div>
umm...yes. =)Nataliehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12768195400316361623noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5928545399620364419.post-64596641977302388792013-03-29T18:07:00.000-07:002013-03-29T18:36:28.097-07:00Yogi Janie<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Jane can scoot, but she can't quite crawl. As Jane is in between phases
right now, her attempts at advancing often look as if she's trying to strengthen her
core while achieving inner tranquility. </div>
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{<i>gently ease yourself into the downward dog position}</i> </div>
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<img border="0" height="427" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEioEiZT3dKDY4IP_0DWhDAOQ859GY-_Hq0M4PnCns3hQysXC_dBsrMZ-0_vDcgSR2sbHxmnnSSMvIL9XbXF3ieg7bie7sQKpSqTWO1ExAnp3Rf7gPD_v10q74G4nFiwX3H57N78_k6zYZc/s640/DSC_0024.JPG" width="640" /></div>
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{<i>while maintaining that position, slowly lift your right leg}</i></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhVl-zT6I_HASDiZCvHCJh-BDhvMhcs04SqULMlIzNzSGhCNtkKgrziONQ7OZjtEiS7q-CUZSV1AbeHAq4rTOZXvQwPp-BJnI7YeIy8oUDsgUxSa70Hsckm4-DYrNfKJEsUsdpL1Jncak4/s1600/DSC_0025.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="428" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhVl-zT6I_HASDiZCvHCJh-BDhvMhcs04SqULMlIzNzSGhCNtkKgrziONQ7OZjtEiS7q-CUZSV1AbeHAq4rTOZXvQwPp-BJnI7YeIy8oUDsgUxSa70Hsckm4-DYrNfKJEsUsdpL1Jncak4/s640/DSC_0025.JPG" width="640" /></a></div>
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<i>{now lift your head and hold that position...breathe...}</i> </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEifkHUriZLNXBTWbwxT1aOFe78yrt6wWBpCOSwqJZBpqygxkotKjXdoYTS4hzkFXLXuv4k3-qWaUtO7Z3Dw7M7qftcVFH8tg7ti5bi39F1RUVRYlGjzEEpWdcc8gyS20GJi31pkwD5QB4o/s1600/DSC_0027.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="428" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEifkHUriZLNXBTWbwxT1aOFe78yrt6wWBpCOSwqJZBpqygxkotKjXdoYTS4hzkFXLXuv4k3-qWaUtO7Z3Dw7M7qftcVFH8tg7ti5bi39F1RUVRYlGjzEEpWdcc8gyS20GJi31pkwD5QB4o/s640/DSC_0027.JPG" width="640" /></a></div>
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Enter Noah and Adam...</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhr6pgkRh4o8ENLPXUarvN4i9MDpW_9h7KNU1E51WELMSgWu1dwYUoujbnX9YUeFVbmZqu7RV7CNN7sR7bvcj5O_KtUzcniWsURgaG4Z_1ifvw2I0RJVteWjyhoHUjVr8VZvEcXDpFyq6Y/s1600/DSC_0047.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="428" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhr6pgkRh4o8ENLPXUarvN4i9MDpW_9h7KNU1E51WELMSgWu1dwYUoujbnX9YUeFVbmZqu7RV7CNN7sR7bvcj5O_KtUzcniWsURgaG4Z_1ifvw2I0RJVteWjyhoHUjVr8VZvEcXDpFyq6Y/s640/DSC_0047.JPG" width="640" /></a></div>
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{<i>relax, smile, relax</i>}</div>
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{<i>And...go back to downward dog</i>}</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjZjztmv798vh9imt-i_VJoiRRmNWdCEgU3YbedEzDccpGz9EzwTSbtbXhPAhxN1Y_NxHbJH_bgbH2OAQVbmI3ibB5Dx4V-yw4wWM20x6IM7O4NDXvUV4CM2W9Ty96MOwbqkP0DYUe_h7A/s1600/DSC_0051.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="428" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjZjztmv798vh9imt-i_VJoiRRmNWdCEgU3YbedEzDccpGz9EzwTSbtbXhPAhxN1Y_NxHbJH_bgbH2OAQVbmI3ibB5Dx4V-yw4wWM20x6IM7O4NDXvUV4CM2W9Ty96MOwbqkP0DYUe_h7A/s640/DSC_0051.JPG" width="640" /></a></div>
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<i>Beautiful quilt courtesy of <a href="http://www.tiltphotography.com/">Amy Springer</a>, who also took the amazing pictures the morning after Jane's birth. She is truly one of my heroes. </i>Nataliehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12768195400316361623noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5928545399620364419.post-1476360135594185282013-03-27T16:34:00.001-07:002013-03-27T16:50:07.433-07:00back from the dead =)It seems like an appropriate time of year for this little blog of mine to come back to life. My computer was out of commission for months because my sons broke the cord and I never made time to order another one. We have a tablet and smart phones, and Kevin has his laptop that he brought home on weekends, so I just got used to living without one. The only real casualty was this blog because it requires lots of typing, which takes too much time on a tablet and weekends go by so quickly that I never thought to post while the laptop was home. My sister-in-law offered me a cord that belonged to a broken laptop of theirs, so here we are again.<br />
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Where to start...? <br />
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Jane is 8 months old today. I really hate that I've missed out on recording her little babyhood. She is so great. She was sortof difficult for the first few months, but has since become very easy and sweet. Not a great sleeper, though I blame that entirely on myself. She's not a bad sleeper. She usually wakes twice a night to eat, but then just goes right back to sleep. She's a petite little thing, but is loving real food, so I think she may start to bulk up a bit. My mother-in-law is a tiny woman, so maybe Jane will be too. Austin continues to love her, but she's gaining more fans around here as she comes to life more and more. She wants to crawl and looks like she's doing yoga as she tries to figure it out. She does manage to roll/scoot wherever she pleases, just not as quickly as she'd like.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj5xLupEQkLO_zvNdTRQ46SrTOy9SjgEMkLRldiOay6JFMMIcjTJHbfJW_GcRG_7DK2DfJPsFMRSvNh10iLDZe6gPBsmuqT9bDENoVynZgZnuf3ea1YUgt7YfL0M1-C-1FwzDekgaQ1X0Y/s1600/DSC_0008.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj5xLupEQkLO_zvNdTRQ46SrTOy9SjgEMkLRldiOay6JFMMIcjTJHbfJW_GcRG_7DK2DfJPsFMRSvNh10iLDZe6gPBsmuqT9bDENoVynZgZnuf3ea1YUgt7YfL0M1-C-1FwzDekgaQ1X0Y/s640/DSC_0008.JPG" width="428" /></a></div>
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Adam is two and is talking more and more. He's got quite the personality, though he can't quite express it fully with his limited language abilities. He makes up for it in spade with his facial expressions and body language. He's a little naughty. Really, quite naughty. Austin told me we could give him to a different family and yesterday Jack declared him the naughtiest boy on earth. Kevin responded by saying that it wasn't so. He had read about a boy in Mexico who really <i>was</i> the naughtiest boy on earth. Of course the boys wanted to know all of the naughty things that boy did, so we spent the next fifteen minutes listing off whatever naughty thing came to mind...cutting every cord in the house, bashing the TV with a hammer, hiding his dad's keys in his diaper, putting paint in the washer...the boys were loving it, and I think it helped them see that Adam really isn't so bad after all. He doesn't do any of those things.<br />
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Austin just turned four and, well, he's a puzzle of extremes at the moment. Take his birthday, for example. I only had a few little things for him to open throughout the day because I hadn't been organized enough to decide on and purchase a main present. He was thrilled with it all. He was grateful and he shared with his brothers all day. We took him to Walmart to pic out something bigger gifts that night. He found a pinwheel, a glowstick, a ball, and a $5 gumball machine and he thought he'd died and gone to heaven. He had a huge smile across his face and said "this is the best birthday ever!" many times. I was so pleased with my grateful little son. BUT...The next day Kevin's parents came over to bring him a gift. They'd called in advance to find out what he liked. We'd told them how he likes to dress up as superheroes. They were nice enough to buy him two great masks. The gifts were nicer than any we had purchased for him. He unwrapped them and immediately scowled and said he didn't want them and that he wouldn't wear them. He threw them on the ground and cried. When it was time for Grandma and Grandpa to leave, he gathered up the masks, pushed them at my mother-in-law and said "You take these to YOUR house, I don't want them!" I was so embarrassed! Fortunately, he is <i>generally</i> neither amazingly good or horribly bad, but you just never know for sure what you'll get from him.<br />
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Noah is so great. He is chipper and sharing. He has quite the knack for peace negotiating and he really just wants everyone to get along. He may be a little too fun-loving :) We recently assigned daily chores to the four older boys. Noah, almost without fail, will say "What!? I have to do this again!? Every day I have to do this and it's the hardest one!..." And then he acts like it's killing him. It takes FOR.EV.ER. and a dozen reminders to actually get it done. They each have their strengths, right? He's starting to read and I think he'll breeze through kindergarten next year. I will miss him something terrible. I love that little guy.<br />
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Taylor is enjoying his Kindergarten year. He is a funny little wonder. Taylor is complex. Some days he is just so hard. He is the source of the most conflict in our home. He is stubborn and unyielding. I shouldn't say UNyielding. He's much more yielding now than he was a few years ago. He sometimes gets it in his mind how things should go, or how they shouldn't and transitioning out of that mindset is difficult for him. But not at school. At school he does great. He's quiet and content. I don't really know what to think of it. I should add that he is also my most grateful child, and is the opposite of Noah when it comes to cleaning. He does his job thoroughly without complaint or a reminder. And he is also my most lovable child and would cuddle with me for hours if I wanted. And he is the best at getting us all laughing. Like I said...complex. I don't know who he'll turn out to be, but he just gets better every year.<br />
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Jack is growing up. He'll be eight in June. He's gone for hours every day and I feel a little more distant from him in general, though it's easy to reconnect with him over a game of Yahtzee or a good book. He's going to be baptized this year and I feel like he is gaining some maturity beyond his years. We're reading the Book of Mormon as a family and are set to finish on his birthday. He pays attention and asks thoughtful questions. He can be a little sulky at times, but he's generally pleasant. He tells me every day what he really wants the most for his birthday, and it changes almost that often. Yesterday it was a violin, the day before it was a bike. With a few months still to go, I'm not going shopping quite yet =)<br />
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And us. Well, we're good. I've been busy at home, wishing away the winter. The weather today has been so nice and I am in a good mood. It has been a LONG winter here in Utah and Kevin has big plans for a modest tree house and I may attempt a tiny garden...if I get brave enough this year. Nicole and I are itching to go out yardsaling again. Mikelle and Jeff got married in February and are living down in Provo, so we still see them weekly, sometimes more if we're lucky. <br />
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And that pretty much sums it up. whew! =)Nataliehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12768195400316361623noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5928545399620364419.post-14852076414635757582012-10-10T15:20:00.001-07:002012-10-10T15:20:43.939-07:00the rundownClearly, this blog is outdated. The pictures, the heading, all of it. Even the content is not very current anymore. I'll be working on the design soon, but for today I'll just be catching up on what's going on in our lives.<br />
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So as you know, we have a girl. She started out quiet and sleepy, then went through a dramatic phase of crying often. I think her tummy hurt her and she would be very fussy often and even inconsolable at times. I was so grateful for the <a href="http://www.miracleblanket.com/index.htm">miracle blanket</a> that our midwife had given us. It really seemed to help her feel better when we swaddled her in it. After about 7 weeks, she turned a corner. I think her digestive system worked out its kinks and suddenly she was happier in general, and never so upset that I couldn't calm her fairly easily. She's just adorable to me. I can't tell if she's really cute or not by the world's standards, but I personally can't imagine loving her more.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhiujrtAWi3248RF2Z_Ozf2EadfPinN7GgOC2BFZDQHwJik0-b8wpVmSPC-43XWHQueVeIEwbS-u5NbazBzghLAHmu3upK5k0ACyTnxxj820GvOvuQHjdIdjtf8oNrSSwpqQWuY7N35IW8/s1600/DSC_0598.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="427" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhiujrtAWi3248RF2Z_Ozf2EadfPinN7GgOC2BFZDQHwJik0-b8wpVmSPC-43XWHQueVeIEwbS-u5NbazBzghLAHmu3upK5k0ACyTnxxj820GvOvuQHjdIdjtf8oNrSSwpqQWuY7N35IW8/s640/DSC_0598.JPG" width="640" /></a></div>
She seems smart and sweet and generally happy. She wakes up at least twice a night, but is getting a little better at staying asleep once I feed her and move her back into her bed (sometimes hours later because I fall asleep). But she has never had a really horrible night and I usually get about three hours of sleep at a time which is better than average. <br />
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(<i>photos courtesy of Noah Larson Photography)</i></div>
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In other news, Taylor started Kindergarten forever ago now. I was anxious to see how he'd do. Taylor is not my<i> most </i>easygoing child at times and I wondered how he'd feel about this new situation. He never went to preschool but he's always done fine in primary at church. I met with his teacher last week and he is doing great. He's made eight friends, plays tag every day at recess, is progressing academically, and overall he's just moving along quite swimmingly. I think the structure is good for him. Structured is not the first word I'd use to describe our home life, so I'm glad he's taking to it at school. </div>
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Noah is a pleasant little guy to have around as the oldest while Jack and Tays are at school. Often we get about half an hour to ourselves after they leave and before someone else wakes up. We like to read together. He's funny and smart. I know people say their children get bored before they are old enough for school, but I've never had that problem. I'm guessing it is because there are many brothers to keep them company. If I don't intervene, they could spend all day getting into mischief of one kind or another. Noah is a pretty good ring leader and a pretty amazing peacemaker. </div>
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Right now the boys are running in with cups, filling them with water, and carefully going back outside. When I asked Taylor what they were doing he hesitated, then said, "it's just...something fun...um...nothing really." Oh boy. </div>
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Jack has adjusted just fine to the full day of school. I miss him, but we're both staying busy. He likes his teacher and she seems good. Not as nice as his teacher last year, not as sweet. But she seems even tempered and pleasant enough. He doesn't complain about anything. When I met with her the only thing negative she had to say was that Jack often takes off one of his shoes and says his foot hurts. I had no idea. I still need to ask him about that.</div>
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Austin continues to love LOVE baby Jane. Now that she smiles and coos a bit, the other boys are a little more interested in her too. For Austin, though, there is nothing conditional about his love. If she cries, he just professes his love for her even louder and more enthusiastically in an attempt to cheer her up. He's generally cheerful himself, but occasionally flips out for dumb reasons, causing me to think he really should still be taking naps. He won't do it, no matter how I try to bribe him to. So, we have a cranky Austin from time to time, but most of the time he's a wonderful little pal to me. and to Jane.</div>
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Adam has improved quite a lot. He still has a mean streak, but it doesn't come out nearly as often as a few months ago. He's not talking much and I wonder if expanding his language would help him to feel less frustrated overall. He doesn't like to talk. He loves making noises that sound like talking, and every now and then he'll shock me with words like "hot dog" or "cookie" when he sees a great benefit in expressing clearly what it is that he wants, but if I try to get him to say anything he'll just say "no." and that is that. Sometimes, if he's in the mood, he'll humor me and go along with my requests just long enough to let me know he knows exactly what I'm asking. Then he'll be done and won't say another thing. </div>
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And as for me, I'm trying to be better right now. I'm trying to get to bed earlier, to be kinder, to read my scriptures throughout the day, to limit TV in general and to be very careful about what I watch. I'm also really trying to get my house in order. I'm reading a book right now by Richard G. Scott. One thing I read today was "Discover how a clean, neat, quiet place can enhance spiritual direction in your life." I can't go to the temple as often as I like, and things aren't often very quiet here at home, but I'm working on the clean and neat part. I feel like it will add a degree of peace that I'd like to have in my life. </div>
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And then there's Kevin. He's wonderful in so many ways. </div>
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I don't mean to short change him, but I have no time left and this post has taken me all day as it is and 4:12 in the afternoon happens to always be pretty awful around here. Everyone starts to get starving and Jane starts being super needy and no one wants to do homework...and suddenly my house seems to explode and is messier than it was just minutes ago and dinner seems like a difficult question. So, I'm off to face all of that with a baby in one arm and 3 whiners who are about to die of starvation following me around. =) Dinner suggestions anyone?</div>
Nataliehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12768195400316361623noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5928545399620364419.post-82496456735613992882012-09-20T13:39:00.003-07:002012-09-20T13:39:41.250-07:00her biggest fan<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
Every time he sees Jane, Austin says "Baby Janie is so Teute!" with a huge
smile on his face. He'll tell her she's SO beautiful and ask her if
she's happy.<img border="0" height="428" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgft-uHHoKDhlTchmOo5HR6JydkNsKybLl1S-SFKiDCPDrwNTm9MatQrU3eVC6fH-k5S4Zhz3yILCk9qOWbtninmmovs6qHMggttZMBdhEZrptI-25HkD8l6fvNGD93v3SeBHbBKv6l0xc/s640/DSC_0613.JPG" width="640" /></div>
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Austin loves Jane with all his heart. I'll say "I love you Austin" and he'll say "and <i>I</i> wuv baby Jane"</div>
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When she was brand new he'd get face to face with her and ask "do you know me, janie? Do you know me?" in a sweet, high pitched voice.</div>
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Now that they've spent considerable time together he instead says "Do you wuv me, baby Janie?"</div>
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I think she must. Who wouldn't love a brother like Austy?</div>
Nataliehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12768195400316361623noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5928545399620364419.post-41272682634833579432012-09-18T09:05:00.000-07:002012-09-18T09:05:23.337-07:00how we're doing<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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she usually has a great half hour in the morning, calm and happy.</div>
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(sweetest baby ever) </div>
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a pretty needy rest of the day, lots of holding, sprinkled with short little naps.</div>
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(nothing accomplished for hours on end) </div>
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a fussy, uncomfortable hour or so in the evening, digestion isn't so fun.</div>
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(sad, rough, poor jane, poor parents) </div>
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and a night of bonding, as she strongly prefers my bed over her own.</div>
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(jane sleeps well, i do not) </div>
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thank heaven for little girls.</div>
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(and husbands who do laundry and clean kitchens)</div>
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Nataliehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12768195400316361623noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5928545399620364419.post-89480234024321471522012-08-13T13:05:00.001-07:002012-08-13T13:05:29.059-07:00two week updateJane.<br />
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I can't believe how fast time is going. Jane is over 2 weeks old. She has been sweet and sleepy and calm amidst the whirlwind of visitors and activity. My family drove down last Saturday and stayed for a week. It was heaven. Today it's just us, the seven of us, here at home. Four of my six are actually napping. This is usual for Adam and Jane, but Taylor and Austin were being horrible so I insisted that they get some rest too. Noah and Jack are playing legos downstairs and I'm trying to take advantage of this quiet minute before things get bustling again.<br />
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Jane is the sweetest little girl ever. She eats so well, never spits up, fusses very little, sleeps like a champ (although it is often in with me because I fall asleep nursing her), loves baths, smiles so often it seems like she means it, but has a good set of pipes that she is not shy about using if she needs to. I am crazy about her.<br />
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The boys seem to be adjusting well...except Adam. He was already going through a violent phase before she was born, and he's managed to bite her twice, scratch her once, and bonk her a few times. I don't know what to do except keep him away from her. It's not just her, either. He kept attacking my friend's little girl the other day, and will sometimes beat up on his older brothers too. They think it's funny and call him the Warrior, which is probably a huge part of the problem. I'm just not sure how to handle it, so if anyone has suggestions, I'm all ears. Austin loves her. He said "He likes me so much, and I LOVE him." Every now and then he'll call her "she" but mostly not, and I love it. He knows she's a girl, but hasn't had much experience with feminine pronouns.<br />
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School starts too soon. I still haven't bought any supplies and I really want one more month to just get my feet under me. I was surprised to see that only one of Jack's good friends from last year will be in his first grade class, but he seems fine with it. Taylor will have Jack's teacher from last year and I'm so glad. I think it will be a good fit. I meet Jack's teacher on Thursday and am hoping she'll be as great. <br />
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Time is up=) <br />
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<br />Nataliehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12768195400316361623noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5928545399620364419.post-28893855594721565632012-07-30T11:26:00.001-07:002012-08-02T16:11:05.505-07:00Welcoming Jane<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I'm not sure where to start this story, because it's beginning is hard to define, which is exactly why it turned out the way it did.<br />
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On the morning of July 26th we had plans to meet up with Nicole and her children at a man made little lake in Cedar Hills. We packed a lunch and headed out. Due to car trouble, they couldn't meet us so we ended up packing up and heading over to visit them. My boys love their cousins and it was a very pleasant visit for me too. I wasn't feeling any contractions, but sometime in the afternoon the baby felt significantly lower in my hips. I didn't think <i>too</i> much of it, but I do always get a little excited when it feels like things are progressing.<br />
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We went home and I got Adam down for a nap. The other boys were watching a movie and I wondered if resting might help to get some contractions going. I did rest, but nothing.<br />
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At seven we had a Relief Society activity. It was all about pampering and relaxing and I got a foot soak, a massage, some great make-up tips, some homemade sugar scrubs and lotions, and the final class was on relaxing breathing techniques. My friend Randi (who is also pregnant) and couldn't stop yawning=). Even though we left late, I made Randi go for a walk with me. We went a few times earlier this summer, but it's been forever and I was hoping maybe a walk would help kick start some serious contractions. We went for a good walk, 2 miles with lots of hills, but nothing. We got home a little after 10.<br />
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Kevin and I watched an old episode of Numb3rs on netflicks and had some ice cream. During about the last 15 minutes of the show I had 2 pretty good contractions. They were not much more than others I've had in the past few weeks, but they felt a little stronger. I was really hot, so after the show I went out and sat on the back steps. I saw a shooting star and wondered if it was a sign=) Kevin joined me and we decided to read our nightly conference talk outside because it felt so nice out there. Toward the end of reading, I had a contraction that made it difficult for me to read out loud. When I stood up, I had another rough one. I'm guessing it was probably about 11:15 or so at this point. We went inside and cleaned up a few things before heading upstairs.<br />
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I had 2 more contractions and decided it was time to call Rebecca. It was hard to know what to tell her because I hadn't been really timing the contractions, and they hadn't been steady. She said she'd load up her car and that we should call her in 15 minutes to let her know if she should come or go to bed and wait. We hung up and Kevin started getting the birthing tub blown up. 2 minutes later another contraction came on strong. My water broke. It was 11:37. Kevin called Rebecca back and told her that my water broke. When that happened with Adam (the only other time it has broken on its own), I was already at a 10. She said she'd come as fast as she could. <br />
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From here, it was all a little crazy. Kevin focused on getting the tub blown up and filled while I focused on...I don't know, survival I guess=) My contractions were intense with very little time in between. I spent some time laying on my bed, some time in the bathroom, some time just walking around, some time kneeling by my bed. My friend Amber had shown me a position she uses during labor and it totally saved me. For the worst parts I'd call Kevin in to help push on my back. It was really helpful. He'd tell me how great I was doing, and it was
nice to hear even though I knew it is the obligation of husbands to say
such things in moments such as these. When the contraction died down a
bit, he'd go back to to getting the tub filled. It seemed to take
forever.<br />
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It was just after midnight and I was in the bathroom when I realized that the baby was coming any minute. I was in the middle of a very hard contraction, and it was all I could do to get up and move to the tub, which by this time had about 6 inches of water in it. I said something like "this baby is coming right now", climbed in and within seconds, there she was. It was 12:04 on July 27th. She slid out with one little push. I scooped her up and started rubbing her back. She started crying and I felt relieved. I told Kevin to call Rebecca and find out what we should do. She said just hold her skin to skin and keep her warm and make sure we don't pull on the cord. She would be there soon. Little Jane started nursing almost right away and was looking around. It felt unreal that she was there in my arms, that the pain was over, that this little girl was mine.<br />
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Kevin
added bucket after bucket of warm water to the tub and brought a towel
to put around Jane. He did such a great job taking care of us until
Rebecca arrived. She arrived about 15 minutes later. Due to
construction on the freeway, she was stuck going 30 for miles and
miles. She looked Jane over and declared her perfect. She delivered
the placenta and Kevin cut the cord. I didn't have any tearing and all
was well with me too. I was able to hold and feed Jane for over an
hour, then Rebecca did a thorough check up with her. She was 6 pounds,
10 ounces, 19.5 inches. Everything was normal and good.<br />
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The sky was amazing on the morning of her birth: </div>
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Rebecca left at about 3:30 and Jane slept and slept. I woke up every hour or so, making sure she was still alright. It felt strange that such a new little fragile baby was left in our care. She just slept peacefully. It seemed miraculous that a few hours ago she had never breathed air, and now here she was, in her bed, breathing peacefully.<br />
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In the morning, as the boys started to wake up, we called my friend Amy who is an <a href="http://tiltphotography.com/">amazing photographer.</a> We wanted her to capture the first few moments of our new family all together. I'm still in awe of the gift she gave us:<br />
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Welcome to the family Jane Elizabeth! We are so thrilled to have you!</div>
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We've been so well taken care of by our friends and family, I'm blown away by their goodness.</div>
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I just wanted to add...</div>
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Before this pregnancy, I never would have considered a home birth. I felt a lot of peace about the choice this time and moved forward with it. I'm not the sort of tough person who does hard things on purpose, so this was uncharacteristic of me. Even I couldn't put my finger on why I felt so okay with it. </div>
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But had I not planned a home birth, Jane would probably been born in our van. We're about 25 minutes from our hospital, and I can't imagine that I would have been able to get someone to be home with the boys and made it in time. It just wouldn't have been possible. I'm so grateful that although it didn't go exactly as planned, it was a wonderful experience. I am so blessed.</div>
<br />Nataliehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12768195400316361623noreply@blogger.com19tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5928545399620364419.post-2722893442667754142012-07-24T15:17:00.001-07:002012-07-24T15:22:33.175-07:00patient thoughtsThe days are going along, quickly and slowly.<br />
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Our sweet baby girl could join our family at any time, or she could wait a few more weeks.<br />
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A few nights ago I was up for hours with contractions that eventually died down. I'm trying to be more patient this time, because there is no time like right now. I told Kevin the other night that I think I'm a contraction junkie. It really is thrilling to feel a tightening and wonder if something will come of it. To know that something good <i>is</i> coming, <i>sometime</i> soon. It really is amazing to be in this place of anticipation and appreciate all that I have already, to soak up these last few days of just boys and take advantage of the nesting instinct that compels me to clean and organize. I'm trying to learn to just sleep in the night, rather than time my inconsistent contractions. This birth will be different from all the rest, just as each of my births have been. I need to remember that. My pregnancies are all pretty much the same, but my labors have all been different. <br />
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This one is especially unique because I'm having this baby at home with <a href="http://www.greatexpectationsbc.com/">a midwife</a>. She is actually a certified nurse practitioner midwife who has attended almost 500 births. She has a wonderful reputation and track record and I feel great about this choice. There is a part of me that is not so excited. The part that doesn't like pain, mostly. But that little wimpy part aside, I'm all for it. It feels more peaceful to me for a lot of reasons:<br />
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1. I like that I have a good, personal relationship with the person who will be delivering my baby. I've never had to wait a minute in her office. She greets me at the door. She knows my boys by name and involves them as much as they wish to be involved in hearing the heartbeat or whatever. Mostly they just hang out and watch movies and play with all of the toys she has there. Her office is up near Kevin's, so he meets me there for the appointments to help with the boys. I've had some good and bad doctor experiences over the years, but none has been ideal. They have been impersonal and in three cases, I've just ended up with whoever was on call from my doctor's office, meeting them as they rushed in to catch the baby. I loved my labor and delivery nurse when Adam was born, she was fantastic. But my doctor was in the room for a total of maybe 15 minutes. I like that I can call Rebecca on her cell phone and <i>she'll</i> come, and not leave until well after the baby is born. I feel like I'm in capable, supportive, caring hands.<br />
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2. She has a very good track record and is a good blend of natural and medical. With this pregnancy, I've had all of the same tests and blood work, ultrasounds, etc. It is important for me to know that I'm doing what I can to ensure that my baby is safe and well and that there aren't any red flags that I'm overlooking. Because of her medical background, I feel assured that this is the case. We've talked extensively about different problems that could come up in labor, and she has explained to me what she would do in each case and I feel very safe in her experienced hands. That being said, she views birth as a natural process, not a medical procedure. I'm excited to have this new experience and see how it compares to my hospital births.<br />
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3. I'm not nearly as stressed over what to do with the boys when I go into labor, especially in the middle of the night. I realize now how much this one little aspect has affected my last few weeks of my last three pregnancies. I had a really hard time sleeping, especially if I was having any contractions at all. This little problem has been the single most stressful part of my pregnancies. It has always worked out, but by the time the baby came I was totally worn out from stressful, sleepless nights. Now, although I'm anxious for her to arrive, I can actually relax at night and that has made a huge difference. I've had one rough night, but that is a huge improvement over the past. Instead of fearing that something will happen in the middle of the night, I hope it does and my boys can wake up to the news of a new sister. If not, I have people who can watch the boys and I won't have to wake anyone up.<br />
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I know there are people in my life who are nervous about the idea of a home birth. A few years ago, I would never have even seriously considered a natural birth. To be honest, the decision started out as more financial than anything. But now we have an individual insurance plan and the cost would be the same for us if we were to deliver in the hospital. I've had plenty of time to consider the pros and cons and change my mind, but I feel a lot of peace about this decision and so does Kevin (I <i>never</i> thought that would be the case.) I'm excited to see how it will all go. That part is always the same...I'm working on remaining calm so I don't die of anticipation. The thought of no epidural does make me a <i>little </i>more patient=)<br />
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I have a dresser full of pink and purple upstairs, just waiting. Am I the only one in the world who thinks ruffles on the bums of tiny outfits is pretty much the sweetest thing ever? <br />
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In other news, I am DONE with school. Hooray! I told myself that I'd just finish, that I didn't need awesome grades, I just needed to be done, so I shouldn't stress. I told myself that, but I should have known that is not my style and I couldn't change. I did stress a lot. I couldn't bring myself to do a half-baked job or to skip an assignment, even if it was little. It was rough, but now I am done and have a degree. Kevin took me out to dinner to celebrate. His friend is part owner of a restored 1930's Cadillac that people rent for weddings and anniversaries. Without telling me, Kevin arranged for him to pick us up, drive us to dinner, then over to daybreak where there was a live band and we walked around the lake. We took a wrong turn on our walk and it was a lot longer than I thought it would be, but you'll be glad to hear that I managed to not wet my pants=) It was so, so fun. Totally unexpected, and not the sort of thing I would have thought I'd love, but it was perfect.<br />
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Oh, and speaking of wet pants, Austin pretty much potty trained himself and now can even last through the night without any trouble. I wasn't motivated to take this on, but he declared that if he is big enough to do somersaults, then he was ready to wear undies, and be done with bottles and binkies. That sounded logical to me, so we went with it and he hasn't turned back. <br />
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I miss Kristen and Gavin. They're doing well, getting all settled in Illinois. That has been a damper on my summer. I'm trying not to think of Marlee, Luke and sweet little Ivy leaving soon. We've had a lot of great family time and I'm very glad Kevin has so many from his side close by. And we'll have Mikelle for at least one more year, so I shouldn't complain...but I do miss Kristen and Gavin.<br />
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We've actually been having a great summer, full of lots of fun days. Jack has greatly improved as a reader and Taylor is on target for Kindergarten. With lots of busy excitement ahead, I'm learning to appreciate that these slower days are numbered and that I shouldn't be impatient. <br />
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That being said, I'll let you know when anything exciting happens.=) <br />
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patience. patience.<br />
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ps. I wrote this post over the course of several days...so I repeat a few ideas. sorry.<br />
<br />Nataliehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12768195400316361623noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5928545399620364419.post-55497088122171227422012-06-06T10:01:00.002-07:002012-06-06T10:02:04.378-07:00somethingToday seems like a good day to get back into blogging. In truth, I've been just trying to keep my head above water for the last few months and blogging has been on the back burner. It's too bad really, because there are a lot of lovely things I could have documented. Except taking pictures has been on the back burner too, so the posts probably would have been pretty boring.<br />
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As for the state of things now...they're still crazy. I'm going strong in my classes. I'm taking a marriage class and a New Testament class and I know what you're thinking {easy!} because that is what I was thinking too when I signed up for them. In some ways they are easy. The reading is easy to comprehend and I don't have to do any equations of any sort, so hooray for that! But there is a LOT of reading, and hours of writing to be done each week. My poor little sons. They're becoming more independent out of necessity but overall we're getting along pretty well.<br />
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I officially have two months left in my pregnancy and I feel it. It will go fast and slow. We'll be visiting Washington for a few weeks and I can't wait for that. And I'll be graduating at the end of July, and that will be SO great. Honestly, I think adding a baby to our family will be less crazy than these last few months of trying to balance life and school. <br />
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As far as catch up highlights go...<br />
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My sister-in-law Nicole had her baby girl (Kate!) after 3 boys. How fun that we both get our girls within a few months of each other!<br />
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Gavin graduated so he and Kristen moved out to Illinois where he'll be working...I miss her every day, but console myself by listening to the CD she finished just before she left. Listen <a href="http://kristensmusicbox.com/listen">here.</a><br />
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<i>{on our last day with Auntie Kristen before the move} </i></div>
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Jack graduated from Kindergarten and it's a joy to have him home full time.<i> </i></div>
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(that's Mia there in the red...)</div>
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We've been up the canyon many times already this year...I'm afraid I'm addicted to the mountains.<br />
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My sister-in-law Andy had her FOURTH girl (Clara!) and I can't wait to meet her...someday.<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgbsqVzuwByusAhEhiqSlpzyNGaZ67UtZ0SAb7b8X5axwyBTsFzvvQl2xiJn6l72CgaNyyHzo5CglKZ38YXtxDj7kUs_e9EnM-QCfpSPzYg32PR42kfyiDvas0u1UP_h_F8FVzA7nziivA/s1600/baby+clara.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgbsqVzuwByusAhEhiqSlpzyNGaZ67UtZ0SAb7b8X5axwyBTsFzvvQl2xiJn6l72CgaNyyHzo5CglKZ38YXtxDj7kUs_e9EnM-QCfpSPzYg32PR42kfyiDvas0u1UP_h_F8FVzA7nziivA/s400/baby+clara.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
Adam is a wanderer and its been scary to have him disappear a few times. He's a little boy now and it's amazing to watch his personality blossom. He was my most mellow baby, but he is starting to give me a run for my money=)<br />
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We had our first stitches just yesterday morning when Austin ran into the corner of the kitchen counter, so that was exciting. It's interesting...we've been without insurance for over a year and thankfully haven't needed it. The very week we got it again, this happened. We've been very blessed.<br />
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Kevin took him to our pediatricians office and they were able to get him right in. Lucky that Kevin hadn't left for work yet, another blessing for me. Austin was very brave and didn't cry a bit. He told me how they put magic lotion on his head so it wouldn't hurt anymore, how he watched Finding Nemo, and he was especially happy about the angry birds bandaid they put on him.<br />
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Of course, there is so much I've failed to capture, but it's something.=) I hope your Summer is off to a good start!Nataliehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12768195400316361623noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5928545399620364419.post-18665001030002275932012-03-26T12:49:00.000-07:002012-03-26T12:49:37.212-07:00Ivy<div style="text-align: center;">Marlee and Luke welcomed little Ivy into their family last Thursday!</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhM_PqlOjoiiRIBurCB1Fp6H1gSH7No3vlhEXqK6cv4JpUPd8P4fikXaVDQoAdCH7oaogfvXQeju45wurdel3KaFAyBjvAxPsAdtwPC_WsjOQq2Uu0xPwvwOwo4qGWajnUeve2hzdt8nAI/s1600/DSC_0539.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhM_PqlOjoiiRIBurCB1Fp6H1gSH7No3vlhEXqK6cv4JpUPd8P4fikXaVDQoAdCH7oaogfvXQeju45wurdel3KaFAyBjvAxPsAdtwPC_WsjOQq2Uu0xPwvwOwo4qGWajnUeve2hzdt8nAI/s640/DSC_0539.JPG" width="427" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIdtHPWHCjQcy5sw6jz-cbrHOrP-I2-iee7PQXcVsD-U4BrlIHBbpraqiXn1j3s31hO_7CMIIoEqx5mFfS6tn46C5MjKGt6xjQIhXPv81KmJ9wFu2nL0El5raRxeerbVqMi6TwtALsso0/s1600/DSC_0525.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="267" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIdtHPWHCjQcy5sw6jz-cbrHOrP-I2-iee7PQXcVsD-U4BrlIHBbpraqiXn1j3s31hO_7CMIIoEqx5mFfS6tn46C5MjKGt6xjQIhXPv81KmJ9wFu2nL0El5raRxeerbVqMi6TwtALsso0/s400/DSC_0525.JPG" width="400" /> </a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Doesn't Marlee look so great?? </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEii0IH1eRPVjugACglzIEZqm-Tt8eukg7f0rJXG03hc-5E_9U0_56cg3ig46eTkBodP3h6fvmuPdralb-57JBeEkuAKW6ed734b3g2ct5fVp6dFCX0pIz4bT3EZqi5M4bVJeCjvLAMvre4/s1600/DSC_0537.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="267" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEii0IH1eRPVjugACglzIEZqm-Tt8eukg7f0rJXG03hc-5E_9U0_56cg3ig46eTkBodP3h6fvmuPdralb-57JBeEkuAKW6ed734b3g2ct5fVp6dFCX0pIz4bT3EZqi5M4bVJeCjvLAMvre4/s400/DSC_0537.JPG" width="400" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;">On Friday, Kevin and I took the boys to meet their new, beautiful little cousin:</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh87Ycenv17sU0ev5sROIlil45XvHst0wyzA9q29t5zlneW5NNjayGRqih_fQRlRq-01vnzpLVqGBa_M6NhaEIuKr27js-iZ8EO5gT_vh1ObC41gRRqdZx9AnMAIt5WIihq9G-HlWOhG4w/s1600/DSC_0543.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh87Ycenv17sU0ev5sROIlil45XvHst0wyzA9q29t5zlneW5NNjayGRqih_fQRlRq-01vnzpLVqGBa_M6NhaEIuKr27js-iZ8EO5gT_vh1ObC41gRRqdZx9AnMAIt5WIihq9G-HlWOhG4w/s640/DSC_0543.JPG" width="427" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; 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text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiK63mIfdS3ZNj4rcvmvH2zlBbzgMgbASSCOTSOdjTdH0lEZw_aMs8Vq-YmwGOWYn-KR853RMoiweAp6yQFoP1trGjI6UkJwUOSKHLnixK1kVpXuAp0quZ9_9ipkuLq98KlklUxJOLWTi0/s1600/DSC_0529.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="267" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiK63mIfdS3ZNj4rcvmvH2zlBbzgMgbASSCOTSOdjTdH0lEZw_aMs8Vq-YmwGOWYn-KR853RMoiweAp6yQFoP1trGjI6UkJwUOSKHLnixK1kVpXuAp0quZ9_9ipkuLq98KlklUxJOLWTi0/s400/DSC_0529.JPG" width="400" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjnfABZdXjRtKajGaorC0b5jD8Dyv6H57T0du_GJnkpJPC8Otc6VxzXckOXhJ0rKYWnv9F4cw5uQXelMD-GLtJTbV8BW512FToVxLHmuLLswoj-3k-DNsHxMuQXpYJx4_XFU3UhKVz5R8k/s1600/DSC_0565.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="428" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjnfABZdXjRtKajGaorC0b5jD8Dyv6H57T0du_GJnkpJPC8Otc6VxzXckOXhJ0rKYWnv9F4cw5uQXelMD-GLtJTbV8BW512FToVxLHmuLLswoj-3k-DNsHxMuQXpYJx4_XFU3UhKVz5R8k/s640/DSC_0565.JPG" width="640" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;">Taylor could not get enough. He wanted to hold her, and see her fingers, and touch her toes. He was delighted with <i>everything</i> about her! And who could blame him?</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">Marlee is doing just amazingly well. I feel like I was a huge baby about everything after Jack was born...it was not an easy adjustment for me and while I adored my little Jacket, I was a mess. Marlee is surprisingly tough. I guess in a way it isn't surprising, but her mantra has long been "I do what I want" and, well, babies tend to make that suddenly impossible. I guess I expected more resistance, or...something. But no. She's upbeat and just doing it like it's nothing. Amazing.</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">They even joined us for dinner yesterday, and I couldn't get over how cute little Ivy is! </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiAWSvYRpTf2anHF-sROJxIFTqG7iJaqfhp_uhfcpVAnymw81jcBPCY4fgCNiMULLGf923exEipD9fOzVg0qvvV8v2UYiO_K7gDvPej6Pd50YB8pqxGlWZYKpyRL71torCvwvtIW9eQqzc/s1600/DSC_0578.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiAWSvYRpTf2anHF-sROJxIFTqG7iJaqfhp_uhfcpVAnymw81jcBPCY4fgCNiMULLGf923exEipD9fOzVg0qvvV8v2UYiO_K7gDvPej6Pd50YB8pqxGlWZYKpyRL71torCvwvtIW9eQqzc/s400/DSC_0578.JPG" width="267" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"> I love her dark hair and dark eyes!</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiwn4g1HFpP_ln-be2WynfGaenl-i7eXGXkIlXHvTjHtwW1OA6T5Abu5PsL1-cBzzqU7uU1FkkLNRHyfnDCrqHtskYcqVieq7phwpvO8XCAYq8Q5VH3OImcjjiopU6FZjofVhS1bSLDmFs/s1600/DSC_0579.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="428" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiwn4g1HFpP_ln-be2WynfGaenl-i7eXGXkIlXHvTjHtwW1OA6T5Abu5PsL1-cBzzqU7uU1FkkLNRHyfnDCrqHtskYcqVieq7phwpvO8XCAYq8Q5VH3OImcjjiopU6FZjofVhS1bSLDmFs/s640/DSC_0579.JPG" width="640" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;">So far, she's handling the whole "coming to earth" ordeal much like her mother is facing her huge new role...</div><div style="text-align: center;">taking it in stride like it's no big deal.=)</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">Congratulations, Little Ivy. You've got a great life ahead of you! </div>Nataliehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12768195400316361623noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5928545399620364419.post-60900416042245206072012-03-20T18:25:00.001-07:002012-03-20T18:29:05.646-07:00taylor's got talent<div style="text-align: center;">Taylor loves to eat. a lot. He's done this before, and I think it's absolutely crazy. </div><div style="text-align: center;">He really doesn't chew <i>at all. </i>I'm both amazed and horrified=)</div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><object class="BLOGGER-youtube-video" classid="clsid:D27CDB6E-AE6D-11cf-96B8-444553540000" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0" data-thumbnail-src="http://1.gvt0.com/vi/SMybJq_HjE0/0.jpg" height="266" width="320"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/SMybJq_HjE0&fs=1&source=uds" /><param name="bgcolor" value="#FFFFFF" /><embed width="320" height="266" src="http://www.youtube.com/v/SMybJq_HjE0&fs=1&source=uds" type="application/x-shockwave-flash"></embed></object></div>Nataliehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12768195400316361623noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5928545399620364419.post-79922277905666572452012-03-15T09:48:00.000-07:002012-03-15T09:48:02.405-07:00happy times<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Austin turned 3 on Sunday! We had some beautiful strawberries and he was eating one. He declared it to be his "burday fwaberry!" so we took it a step further and added a candle.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2pBuYYV87zmOAcn1d8LSzPBv5EcEt_AKDDqlpeqAEsY1_xyXFWxnZKKrpXTwJBr38MJuLIhoKP-muvijgS60EEQQKsAGOy3yv1lVwsRx9XQppMzucfb7kk_9CY9tqeCSiY-eZUwTY4dQ/s1600/DSC_0538.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="287" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2pBuYYV87zmOAcn1d8LSzPBv5EcEt_AKDDqlpeqAEsY1_xyXFWxnZKKrpXTwJBr38MJuLIhoKP-muvijgS60EEQQKsAGOy3yv1lVwsRx9XQppMzucfb7kk_9CY9tqeCSiY-eZUwTY4dQ/s400/DSC_0538.JPG" width="400" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-ohobSouX2kCk704cbaLOv32KWXbsnjZtCQE17XLbyJtei5Jhfd42gxut7Ra4Iagey0RpwB5pNUcVAeoEgYIWRcSb7Cx5OZftwevMWhnrf9mw69WaQC0PGpVv7BQhp25EUnYE5gtFCcA/s1600/DSC_0539.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="448" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-ohobSouX2kCk704cbaLOv32KWXbsnjZtCQE17XLbyJtei5Jhfd42gxut7Ra4Iagey0RpwB5pNUcVAeoEgYIWRcSb7Cx5OZftwevMWhnrf9mw69WaQC0PGpVv7BQhp25EUnYE5gtFCcA/s640/DSC_0539.JPG" width="640" /></a></div> Later, he decorated his cake with Easter candy. Taylor helped and they had a grand time. There was a little "lick off the frosting and put it back" going on, but it was only eaten by the boys....and kevin, but he's been a dad long enough to mind too much, right honey?<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWmNgwuMOSa1iB6G5bKNDuJ70jYvj0awJ4lVG6voyc0H_gypCstBKp7b1_UASFuf7hWciTIrc_Fs6qbrFflBotFmnJjpXf12WajEfvzgEUc9sLuTiTvbWJAszmLerCqhzdEqOQCucTq6w/s1600/DSC_0555.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWmNgwuMOSa1iB6G5bKNDuJ70jYvj0awJ4lVG6voyc0H_gypCstBKp7b1_UASFuf7hWciTIrc_Fs6qbrFflBotFmnJjpXf12WajEfvzgEUc9sLuTiTvbWJAszmLerCqhzdEqOQCucTq6w/s400/DSC_0555.JPG" width="315" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhb4WQzntBdsgcDmuZDQ0QeWj1MZaZR2Crh1kmLVlfh69XSSO-IqEZkDGeJ_PimHQwJo0TSDNFr-ESnu7e0TMTWlO3eZ3Ig8rlFHuu2Lplv7dkrR0R2SCXnnB63hFM70HVIXERV0wuu-7A/s1600/DSC_0556.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhb4WQzntBdsgcDmuZDQ0QeWj1MZaZR2Crh1kmLVlfh69XSSO-IqEZkDGeJ_PimHQwJo0TSDNFr-ESnu7e0TMTWlO3eZ3Ig8rlFHuu2Lplv7dkrR0R2SCXnnB63hFM70HVIXERV0wuu-7A/s400/DSC_0556.JPG" width="267" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"> Our wonderful Birthday boy!</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhhkkXxYNHA27aKJ5hLCGSzzJmPKVAhsCbrVpx-5j4UkhYdIUyYZEcCwG7kFVsueysmn6TX5yw_Zh5f56oHpO1pZaG_gbgK0J9n6DVOyxTJj075AvVYC2LHIOnJOaOl7CkAOvC0AQPDqJs/s1600/DSC_0559.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhhkkXxYNHA27aKJ5hLCGSzzJmPKVAhsCbrVpx-5j4UkhYdIUyYZEcCwG7kFVsueysmn6TX5yw_Zh5f56oHpO1pZaG_gbgK0J9n6DVOyxTJj075AvVYC2LHIOnJOaOl7CkAOvC0AQPDqJs/s640/DSC_0559.JPG" width="478" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"> It was time to go pick up Jack from school, so I went to find the boys. I'd been working on school stuff, but I could hear them playing in the garage. When I went in, here is what I found:</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhc2TgI_w2ydDpO0N3q4S9Mr6_36cadfkqb7hADYau7BecYXaBYz5bkUO0TCBnO-OLCNQ6S33WpJqdBwJtDu2f3wECiIG5j9MR_qnOuXSJI-gAbBVK_-LJnCyuBv94sQaHMUnBkhuK0dPE/s1600/DSC_0562.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="450" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhc2TgI_w2ydDpO0N3q4S9Mr6_36cadfkqb7hADYau7BecYXaBYz5bkUO0TCBnO-OLCNQ6S33WpJqdBwJtDu2f3wECiIG5j9MR_qnOuXSJI-gAbBVK_-LJnCyuBv94sQaHMUnBkhuK0dPE/s640/DSC_0562.JPG" width="640" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"> It's nice that our sleds are getting some use this winter, ha!</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjU40j9CFahOJKgzkpPFQYEhrbuT4hYheIfGq54dNbIqftdFf1jAob5uu-d9v4deZoXAxEfgD7CIqjCKPj88mry-LPLVAvV4vmwxQldMDjjB764IJp04WMBQ98ZvW1OAVuA81De92AInzY/s1600/DSC_0567.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="406" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjU40j9CFahOJKgzkpPFQYEhrbuT4hYheIfGq54dNbIqftdFf1jAob5uu-d9v4deZoXAxEfgD7CIqjCKPj88mry-LPLVAvV4vmwxQldMDjjB764IJp04WMBQ98ZvW1OAVuA81De92AInzY/s640/DSC_0567.JPG" width="640" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"> Our swing set has only 2 big swings, and this has been the source of much contention lately. Last night the boys (and I) enthusiastically recruited Kevin to help make another one to go up in place of the baby swing.</div><div style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjF59w88g226d8-hUPa7GnC71LYREK-2dRX910wnbwQv2GcuHnpK1MhNGvtRBjTim_Mwh9X9T8xOsylitrPKeS3UtpHvGkX74RcYx_BeHADaATfiD6wRKUNPbghK67V5SUnn5NaxmvVtHA/s1600/DSC_0572.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="496" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjF59w88g226d8-hUPa7GnC71LYREK-2dRX910wnbwQv2GcuHnpK1MhNGvtRBjTim_Mwh9X9T8xOsylitrPKeS3UtpHvGkX74RcYx_BeHADaATfiD6wRKUNPbghK67V5SUnn5NaxmvVtHA/s640/DSC_0572.JPG" width="640" /></a>They all love it when their dad uses tools to do anything and he is very patient and I think he mostly loves it when they crowd around to see every move he makes and ask him why he's doing this or that. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4Ld0GPFnVXKle3zrkSAGvbhwvejrXmKOFH8PC8aeb7QUST6e3tCHToTeyx9c_lrRTf8f45f_tDouWMsHjyHSFMN2SdGGkmdRWFfHJ263HPcIDnAgqJQKNLyQNSNBAoFH_Zma8j5a3Iuc/s1600/DSC_0576.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="325" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4Ld0GPFnVXKle3zrkSAGvbhwvejrXmKOFH8PC8aeb7QUST6e3tCHToTeyx9c_lrRTf8f45f_tDouWMsHjyHSFMN2SdGGkmdRWFfHJ263HPcIDnAgqJQKNLyQNSNBAoFH_Zma8j5a3Iuc/s400/DSC_0576.JPG" width="400" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"> And I can't leave out Adam, my sweet little man. I have yet to figure out how to cut his hair without butchering it, poor fellow. But as raggedy as he looks, he sure is loved!</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhBpyCaTVB8JTQ6mDy6tbirwJfs6UXaqUJWjEouW-G1WQZxv7RRjcRZKoTTs76qg4jGv3uACXF1f05jFAVb0EbwZrnQv4qATv4RwRlrGWt3tOxsUHX6iLD0ICcIEIBslt7FYL5Lc9DxK2c/s1600/DSC_0580.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhBpyCaTVB8JTQ6mDy6tbirwJfs6UXaqUJWjEouW-G1WQZxv7RRjcRZKoTTs76qg4jGv3uACXF1f05jFAVb0EbwZrnQv4qATv4RwRlrGWt3tOxsUHX6iLD0ICcIEIBslt7FYL5Lc9DxK2c/s640/DSC_0580.JPG" width="428" /></a></div><br />
I feel like I am going through one of my most rewarding times ever as a mom. The boys are all somehow in really great places. I know that this, like all phases, is temporary but I keep waking up day after day to find that things are still wonderful and I'm breathing it in as deeply as I can. This may have something to do with being in the 2nd trimester, and coming out of a very mild winter, and having a really great husband. But whatever the reason, I feel so grateful to be where I am right now. I've been through some big lows on this journey, and I know I will again, but times like these are here too, and that's worth mentioning.Nataliehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12768195400316361623noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5928545399620364419.post-11433162259494518612012-03-12T22:19:00.000-07:002012-03-12T22:19:29.947-07:00taste of things to comeToday felt like Spring and we couldn't get enough.<br />
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Kevin took Jack and Taylor golfing with him. They were thrilled to ride in the cart and find abandoned balls. When we tucked them in tonight Taylor said spontaneously, "Dad! Do you know what the best part of my day was? Going golfing with you!" <br />
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When they got home we hung out on the porch and did a little weeding while the boys pulled every last riding apparatus out of our garage and joined neighbors, zooming up and down the sidewalk. <br />
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Later Noah joined me at the store where we purchased all of the essentials for a backyard hot dog roast. We nearly forgot the graham crackers, but he remembered them at the last minute and saved the day.<br />
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We came home to a well-built fire in our well-built little fire pit (good job, Kev) and although the smoke was pretty awful, causing lots of tears and whining, we had a grand time and I ate four s'mores. Adam won the little piggy award, though. I gave him a big marshmallow and he shoved the whole thing in his mouth. They boys couldn't stop laughing at our chubby bunny. So cute. <br />
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Then it was baths and beds for all, and they were sleeping soundly within minutes, as little boys do when they've had a busy, sunny day. <br />
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And so, Spring, I just wanted to say thanks for visiting and we want you to know that we're ready for a long-term relationship whenever you are.Nataliehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12768195400316361623noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5928545399620364419.post-77569087133303819422012-03-08T11:44:00.000-08:002012-03-08T11:44:38.239-08:00sweet jack<div style="text-align: center;">Yesterday I asked Jack to run a book over to a friends house for me. He'd been squirrly and was happy to get out of the house. Adam was sleeping and Noah and Taylor were playing in the basement. Ausin, however, was right there and wouldn't hear of being left behind. I put coats and boots on both and sent them on their way. </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">It was a journey I could see from my window. Jack held Austin's hand and they waited, and waited for a slow car to come and then go before crossing our street. Once across, Jack let go and started along. It was SO cold though. The wind was blowing and Jack quickly put on his hood. He then turned back to Austin who stood still so Jack could pull up his hood too, and fasten the velcro under his chin. It was such a sweet moment and I raced to grab my camera, but missed it. They continued down the sidewalk, Jack slowing his pace so Austin could catch up.</div><br />
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<div style="text-align: center;"> When the book was delivered, I watched them return and it took me a minute </div><div style="text-align: center;">to realize what Jack was doing.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEidtFOf8p-S1FI9vTMWX0GaprrGZLt3gNElqFw9y0gaAHOypY2k_60C0Ju-5zyGcFHumI4HNb4XtniVJTg0aXKpi1-9M2rArN7z7U1HWtZ2m2GtEaWFiFNYm4w5SLZGuLk6_R8bAh09yvg/s1600/DSC_0539.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="267" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEidtFOf8p-S1FI9vTMWX0GaprrGZLt3gNElqFw9y0gaAHOypY2k_60C0Ju-5zyGcFHumI4HNb4XtniVJTg0aXKpi1-9M2rArN7z7U1HWtZ2m2GtEaWFiFNYm4w5SLZGuLk6_R8bAh09yvg/s400/DSC_0539.JPG" width="400" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhLCPVSVoDkSSSw6eQ5nvbfjTM4aSREh8K90ZSWD8kYcnni7GZs7vSEpkNpHmPib-VztyUPBJFGrm31p0foh0aySKBYL3Pb8t8gGDxQPAqumEAe62x0DGGUsEY3_pip5FdOZ7a5tVyGqxY/s1600/DSC_0537.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="428" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhLCPVSVoDkSSSw6eQ5nvbfjTM4aSREh8K90ZSWD8kYcnni7GZs7vSEpkNpHmPib-VztyUPBJFGrm31p0foh0aySKBYL3Pb8t8gGDxQPAqumEAe62x0DGGUsEY3_pip5FdOZ7a5tVyGqxY/s640/DSC_0537.JPG" width="640" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"> He was walking backwards, creating a barrier between Austin and the wind that they were now walking against. They chugged along this way until Jack took his hand to cross the street.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiMxJM27K4zQN6gBTsoDH0KIkaYaeTCw0SUxlXERGT1ec4GPViUlU6NhA9SbCy5crjYssqyEdVoq9unAQ-SdF1QTWpaLpS-dzGrB6JFhIFxM8-QYuFyf22pgUD_mM6hFWhozJ8M_vCsEKU/s1600/DSC_0547.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="267" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiMxJM27K4zQN6gBTsoDH0KIkaYaeTCw0SUxlXERGT1ec4GPViUlU6NhA9SbCy5crjYssqyEdVoq9unAQ-SdF1QTWpaLpS-dzGrB6JFhIFxM8-QYuFyf22pgUD_mM6hFWhozJ8M_vCsEKU/s400/DSC_0547.JPG" width="400" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">As they approached the door, I came out with camera in hand, wanting to get one last picture of the two of them together. But when I asked them to stand still for a second, Jack said</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"> "But Austin is so cold mom, I think he should get inside."</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">And I've been a sortof girly emotional sap with this pregnancy, so I couldn't help but think of these boys, all of these boys, growing up, having eachother...and get a little choked up. </div>Nataliehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12768195400316361623noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5928545399620364419.post-61765758663313726812012-03-05T11:42:00.001-08:002012-03-05T11:45:01.816-08:00school updateSo, I have already started an online class. It is just the 1 credit little intro class that every online student needs to take before anything else. The trouble is, it takes quite a lot of time and it's really not necessary in my case. Its purpose seems to be three-fold:<br />
<br />
1. Introduce students to "the Spirit of BYU-Idaho" and the foundations upon which it was built. <em>I attended classes there for two years, lived by the honor code, went to every devotional, and really did come to appreciate the unique atmosphere and purpose.</em><br />
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2. Prepare students for online learning, BYU-Idaho style. T<em>he program they use is not hard to figure out. It's actually really easy. And I get that in this school there will be a lot more "interaction" between the students via discussion groups and that classes are structured in a way to keep everyone progressing at the same pace. I know how to email questions, keep up with assignments, buy books, etc.</em><br />
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3. Help students prepare a "graduation plan" and revise that plan several times. <em>My plan is simple: 2 classes. 5 credits. 1 Summer. I'm not sure how to revise that six times. </em><br />
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I wrote to my advisor, trying to plead out of it. I'll take it if I have to, but it really is just a lot of busy work for me. However, I AM very excited to be on my way, even if it has to start like this. <br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: left;">Sorry to continue whining, but I also don't love their online learning model for their classes. I would rather go at my own pace. They only allow you to see one section each week, and it's due within that week. I would rather get a lot done when I have time, and not worry about it during the week we'll be on vacation. Also, I would rather not have to interact with other students. In this class, it feels really forced. We read something, write our thoughts on it, then have to respond to other people's thoughts, then respond to the responses left on our thoughts...If feels a little like: </div><br />
me: I really liked how it said "......"<br />
response: I like how you pointed out how it said "....."<br />
me: yes, I liked that part...<br />
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I'm grateful for the opportunity to finish, I just wish I could do it quickly and quietly. =)Nataliehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12768195400316361623noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5928545399620364419.post-68655319197032519912012-03-02T11:22:00.000-08:002012-03-02T11:22:11.945-08:00hooray for snow!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQ8vq2xX3KOY9NT5FnUuVBR6Ghy5XVJgfesyV4Nn3Ih6PvRM7154tyKfK3_yC5_v-yO-pVeibeX1Cztr4dkkThO5gHnTcxKo1omOqaiTlNqCG45wQgENnBvw4IKuc3m370lrgk04uH34k/s1600/DSC_0541.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQ8vq2xX3KOY9NT5FnUuVBR6Ghy5XVJgfesyV4Nn3Ih6PvRM7154tyKfK3_yC5_v-yO-pVeibeX1Cztr4dkkThO5gHnTcxKo1omOqaiTlNqCG45wQgENnBvw4IKuc3m370lrgk04uH34k/s640/DSC_0541.JPG" uda="true" width="401" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUYPDYzRSaN6lKYf0MNn5mauo3lwhYMqSTaBjOKJiyk5y85aRZ-V4TQiJ-UON46Pq4MYd0bGVs0PuFcPZzMMBX6vChC2ak9cWWMn6ZO6dySyXayf_dlzX5QcGxihZsTJZrtBtw8HrXCtM/s1600/DSC_0525.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="263" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUYPDYzRSaN6lKYf0MNn5mauo3lwhYMqSTaBjOKJiyk5y85aRZ-V4TQiJ-UON46Pq4MYd0bGVs0PuFcPZzMMBX6vChC2ak9cWWMn6ZO6dySyXayf_dlzX5QcGxihZsTJZrtBtw8HrXCtM/s400/DSC_0525.JPG" uda="true" width="400" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCdPmsUp3QJnv95-JZaPGU_GpCq0XSpOP9quudVowlgZ-Ffiu8FeACxnHERpCrJ-bqU9jNt1LCtJHGpnolS84UUgzGGoC5Gg0rgRVwqQdd7L_dmecjbmUdoHM3zhkiqsKDd817ru0S3Yo/s1600/DSC_0529.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCdPmsUp3QJnv95-JZaPGU_GpCq0XSpOP9quudVowlgZ-Ffiu8FeACxnHERpCrJ-bqU9jNt1LCtJHGpnolS84UUgzGGoC5Gg0rgRVwqQdd7L_dmecjbmUdoHM3zhkiqsKDd817ru0S3Yo/s640/DSC_0529.JPG" uda="true" width="380" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiShpUMxME17OWisIh4-cVLBWM9sOlmts2av0zUbkcBK4Z3grp4o6KzKaklPyR4u_BJUGzi9iSv-zIVHIae7-zhYDj4RFv0pdIOTlaWYBQRFGJsQfccx05dcVYcKzQoyPEn5w8JUj2NH5c/s1600/DSC_0532.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="428" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiShpUMxME17OWisIh4-cVLBWM9sOlmts2av0zUbkcBK4Z3grp4o6KzKaklPyR4u_BJUGzi9iSv-zIVHIae7-zhYDj4RFv0pdIOTlaWYBQRFGJsQfccx05dcVYcKzQoyPEn5w8JUj2NH5c/s640/DSC_0532.JPG" uda="true" width="640" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8b6TVY1rrp7n1zMDDdDGiqGh8t7IRBGtPxRUuYHFN4PkFABCBXDAoM1pqEDTwf_6efzyxHfcGy_JVilHZZZUwvDb00YHFBQOyi-vkvScpuP7asOmtGXT0j1nUeiUb51N96T_h_nbFQY8/s1600/DSC_0550.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="278" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8b6TVY1rrp7n1zMDDdDGiqGh8t7IRBGtPxRUuYHFN4PkFABCBXDAoM1pqEDTwf_6efzyxHfcGy_JVilHZZZUwvDb00YHFBQOyi-vkvScpuP7asOmtGXT0j1nUeiUb51N96T_h_nbFQY8/s400/DSC_0550.JPG" uda="true" width="400" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEisGkHIhZFuV-by3un2eqiJUAC2lWISY_9mpU4PkYtnvgI5fwds8FnOTraGFCnK3UJnW7y9YQ-rOuyXsF5fmn_1EUcMEPdjKXggiRROn7bsRNq_4vu3z_6j_jVRMlKYE9dGJwXiRl_7_nE/s1600/DSC_0540.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEisGkHIhZFuV-by3un2eqiJUAC2lWISY_9mpU4PkYtnvgI5fwds8FnOTraGFCnK3UJnW7y9YQ-rOuyXsF5fmn_1EUcMEPdjKXggiRROn7bsRNq_4vu3z_6j_jVRMlKYE9dGJwXiRl_7_nE/s640/DSC_0540.JPG" uda="true" width="428" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhv827gSxhX8U0yJOCTAewpu5PjTiw6xD6M_ZMq47msMHg2Kbs25_Hc1nDGBcvjXDX6ooTT8N8GFWdo7b7B5tOIugERwzO-MKjrI7QXJp0sNvbaeuu0uqQveBZMmyPVN0Gih59eJ48eKbM/s1600/DSC_0563.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhv827gSxhX8U0yJOCTAewpu5PjTiw6xD6M_ZMq47msMHg2Kbs25_Hc1nDGBcvjXDX6ooTT8N8GFWdo7b7B5tOIugERwzO-MKjrI7QXJp0sNvbaeuu0uqQveBZMmyPVN0Gih59eJ48eKbM/s640/DSC_0563.JPG" uda="true" width="428" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Austin kept saying: " I wuv deez. my shoulder pants!"</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div>Nataliehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12768195400316361623noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5928545399620364419.post-21500227973312842942012-03-01T21:43:00.001-08:002012-03-02T09:26:09.650-08:00Marlee's pink and green baby shower<div style="text-align: center;">It was a busy weekend! I should have taken more pictures, and worked at getting better lighting. But, because it's taking me FOREVER to actually post this, here we go:</div><div style="text-align: center;">The Food:</div><div style="text-align: center;"><u>Soups</u></div><div style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://allrecipes.com/recipe/rich-and-creamy-tomato-basil-soup/detail.aspx?event8=1&prop24=SR_Title&e11=tomato%20soup&e8=Quick%20Search&event10=1&e7=Recipe">Creamy Tomato Basil</a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.melskitchencafe.com/2010/10/cream-cheese-chicken-and-vegetable-soup.html">Cream Cheese Chicken & Vegetable</a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.myrecipes.com/recipe/coconut-curry-chicken-soup-10000001860092/">Coconut-Curry Chicken Noodle</a> </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6nM31NNeuBctvxdV8NAjpAvE97cFzKIQW4sMK9AG1W1kGAByDpUvAP0BDHfgLKHgHAGvLFu8zdzYgr_yOaSDcmJXfInz0tcgGLpuq2_IGWPk8d_ocY67jpflpWEmd0-4aPQoBEfqq2iM/s1600/DSC_0539.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="419" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6nM31NNeuBctvxdV8NAjpAvE97cFzKIQW4sMK9AG1W1kGAByDpUvAP0BDHfgLKHgHAGvLFu8zdzYgr_yOaSDcmJXfInz0tcgGLpuq2_IGWPk8d_ocY67jpflpWEmd0-4aPQoBEfqq2iM/s640/DSC_0539.JPG" uda="true" width="640" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"> Salads:</div><div style="text-align: center;">Wonton Chicken</div><div style="text-align: center;">Strawberry Spinach</div><div style="text-align: center;">And Fresh Garden</div><div style="text-align: center;">Fresh Veggie Cups with Dip</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgydlobBtpvBM_LR9WpOBOUGjDUbkD4kkDOPIt6jgU_Wf1jArlZJcuD2uTEyec9rUJiJLV-bDV5Q06G9yiSbmY3hYdqjgUq7xq1cfkcCEtYnZZjAcPs4gh7lcknpZKopN_uAJ1tIjI0joo/s1600/DSC_0537.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="428" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgydlobBtpvBM_LR9WpOBOUGjDUbkD4kkDOPIt6jgU_Wf1jArlZJcuD2uTEyec9rUJiJLV-bDV5Q06G9yiSbmY3hYdqjgUq7xq1cfkcCEtYnZZjAcPs4gh7lcknpZKopN_uAJ1tIjI0joo/s640/DSC_0537.JPG" uda="true" width="640" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Hard Rolls</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"> Red Velvet Cake -<em>thank you Brittney!</em></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Mini Lemon Raspberry cupcakes</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.myrecipes.com/recipe/key-lime-bars-with-macadamia-crust-10000000257389/">Lime Bars with Macadamia Crust</a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Button Shortbread Cookies</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj7noVWmia7It2y0-Y6Ylnlbzhyphenhyphen4URKWhkbkB8HDYFQf6gt0jAb6ti14qlDMvoDywggi-JJ9nF_ML8qgthA_Awte2-l9WVMFcO5J3SHUGuDW41__r10z08zMpkcsEwVxo753SvVVLvuybA/s1600/DSC_0547.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj7noVWmia7It2y0-Y6Ylnlbzhyphenhyphen4URKWhkbkB8HDYFQf6gt0jAb6ti14qlDMvoDywggi-JJ9nF_ML8qgthA_Awte2-l9WVMFcO5J3SHUGuDW41__r10z08zMpkcsEwVxo753SvVVLvuybA/s640/DSC_0547.JPG" uda="true" width="428" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;">Aside from many, many other contributions, Kristen made this tree - we had the guests write well-wishes on leaves to stick on. And Gavin very strategically hung these balloons:<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2EbQPoiUF673CsqPNOkMwyF9yCMZkG9TJE0HB5eSfhQaUuY7_hYzwsm4Yp7ely9yNSQ_yA2yjRl3irb4VBjCfQOGOcV04CHl5QJvpriOzXbiqGt3s0c-s-k7AgKl2q7lzMQwi-L_2i6c/s1600/DSC_0541.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2EbQPoiUF673CsqPNOkMwyF9yCMZkG9TJE0HB5eSfhQaUuY7_hYzwsm4Yp7ely9yNSQ_yA2yjRl3irb4VBjCfQOGOcV04CHl5QJvpriOzXbiqGt3s0c-s-k7AgKl2q7lzMQwi-L_2i6c/s400/DSC_0541.JPG" uda="true" width="317" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">The art supplies were for an alphabet book we made for the baby. Marlee doesn't like games, so we did this "activity" instead. Each guest could choose a letter page, draw a letter-appropriate picture, and sign it. It was so cute! Idea found <a href="http://tieitwithabow.blogspot.com/2011/02/babys-first-alphabet-book.html">here</a>.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">And we had such wonderful guests! I stole some of these pictures from my Aunt Terri, though she managed to stay out of all of the ones I took, as did a few others, sadly.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">the guest of honor opening some of the cutest pink things I've ever seen. I'm not going to lie, I was almost as excited as she was because I'll be getting some darling hand-me downs=) I mean...right, Marlee?</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgBhks1CNa4I_r9jKEGXlK4dY6dpnCAqBajAUeS0JwYBbgTwdD-x08KU0_aqlENYEKNw8zf437scaJdmvQ0bcHNJPPqgSgIdhVMsqKCpRgC8ETkPjw3KSZAuwZEN_qxzJLCj7NMfika7dw/s1600/424215_3311067536730_1269361606_33315130_1684410479_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgBhks1CNa4I_r9jKEGXlK4dY6dpnCAqBajAUeS0JwYBbgTwdD-x08KU0_aqlENYEKNw8zf437scaJdmvQ0bcHNJPPqgSgIdhVMsqKCpRgC8ETkPjw3KSZAuwZEN_qxzJLCj7NMfika7dw/s640/424215_3311067536730_1269361606_33315130_1684410479_n.jpg" uda="true" width="380" /></a></div> Cousins! Marlee, Brooke, Jill, and Destenee<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh6mKowk6YF-wKObh7FkbBAuPinzVScNEgkSwCI5o7-EWEJioil1GXveRJ8LdXMnz9jdVAs7Owk7ch2e07tHqhMY331IbjHbV-W7lXeKZ51uTyP-r0xSexkGq_5Ebzeo4SB88cxIi9sofA/s1600/cousins.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="382" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh6mKowk6YF-wKObh7FkbBAuPinzVScNEgkSwCI5o7-EWEJioil1GXveRJ8LdXMnz9jdVAs7Owk7ch2e07tHqhMY331IbjHbV-W7lXeKZ51uTyP-r0xSexkGq_5Ebzeo4SB88cxIi9sofA/s640/cousins.jpg" uda="true" width="640" /></a></div> Mechams (Cathy, Claire, and Abbie there in the back) with Kristen<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNMe4Q9POkD12egd4he9e06pSE4v9WWSTMWXBtLtZcjb3MwD7q2QkgqSjPsU_wjX8SuobQwB_Ku8dCnBYqNDZyXlT6YfgnF3WRdXTfP-hm5rphnRHb8Dtrtjrz6YrT-A5S2iBJTO-CsGw/s1600/DSC_0543.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="428" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNMe4Q9POkD12egd4he9e06pSE4v9WWSTMWXBtLtZcjb3MwD7q2QkgqSjPsU_wjX8SuobQwB_Ku8dCnBYqNDZyXlT6YfgnF3WRdXTfP-hm5rphnRHb8Dtrtjrz6YrT-A5S2iBJTO-CsGw/s640/DSC_0543.JPG" uda="true" width="640" /></a></div> Mikelle, Ashley, Brittney<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjqtzBrQK8FyHeIHR7ZaxouzfjzC5NMVPQedeaC96FFz_sw_yS_8gN-qhN5qORE8vZp9g6s9yTJlN5X-s5j1HFschCBH_cxo4oXyzlmXpvufDBfLKIQh1ONtPsKQ0qnXqnYTRWcFyH87zQ/s1600/DSC_0544.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjqtzBrQK8FyHeIHR7ZaxouzfjzC5NMVPQedeaC96FFz_sw_yS_8gN-qhN5qORE8vZp9g6s9yTJlN5X-s5j1HFschCBH_cxo4oXyzlmXpvufDBfLKIQh1ONtPsKQ0qnXqnYTRWcFyH87zQ/s640/DSC_0544.JPG" uda="true" width="428" /></a></div>Jill's gorgeous baby Ellie<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgen_5opoWDKdnq933vZpANAX8EtYuXaA_3HoA8INjSyHppU3JymJXTZyQa5lOftpohsqKGqlgI5EguuocGUbLybiyJ7EEZLpdWOyPAd-JPNW5aqMR0wMzj8cNq3NN7jV_32fkP6_gUcho/s1600/ellie.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgen_5opoWDKdnq933vZpANAX8EtYuXaA_3HoA8INjSyHppU3JymJXTZyQa5lOftpohsqKGqlgI5EguuocGUbLybiyJ7EEZLpdWOyPAd-JPNW5aqMR0wMzj8cNq3NN7jV_32fkP6_gUcho/s640/ellie.jpg" uda="true" width="382" /></a></div> wonderful Brittney<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjOua8cPSedWaENnhFXQZCgkAdQWgQsznXYbZCZMo6W_UWdpvmUppLd2MhEPTgzU8bEB6GRWd3DpAXfosm64ak_eld2zg6CKXa4xCQLA071UPJ8JWeAOC8BG4VCALvmEhgfgVo4LMfT-RI/s1600/DSC_0553.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjOua8cPSedWaENnhFXQZCgkAdQWgQsznXYbZCZMo6W_UWdpvmUppLd2MhEPTgzU8bEB6GRWd3DpAXfosm64ak_eld2zg6CKXa4xCQLA071UPJ8JWeAOC8BG4VCALvmEhgfgVo4LMfT-RI/s400/DSC_0553.JPG" uda="true" width="267" /></a></div> Ashley and Aunt Julie working on their drawings<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhy0eJJ-H4IKfabtuc003DVzpIxJkJQVJkBQz1Ti8Zr1NI-qJhSnL_THAYJIOVuxghs_p1NhNvRy6NneF-zlOSHn3DLdV9gi6Ix8yeIpB44C3kePjn2zHOiHuoynvfh5dkX2LS7zkO7y0s/s1600/DSC_0550.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="267" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhy0eJJ-H4IKfabtuc003DVzpIxJkJQVJkBQz1Ti8Zr1NI-qJhSnL_THAYJIOVuxghs_p1NhNvRy6NneF-zlOSHn3DLdV9gi6Ix8yeIpB44C3kePjn2zHOiHuoynvfh5dkX2LS7zkO7y0s/s400/DSC_0550.JPG" uda="true" width="400" /></a></div> Marlee chatting with her prettier-than-life work friends<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqWJBwxbDRMeBkv9pm86y4uebaPZjEGXsNtxbEnubxMC50Vc1cbVJw2z-CykWGyiS4mc78AHEfUb0RfWudpc1LDLmeC3Zmy0WrwJDXM4eSuDX4cDuRDKv3iPJynp11Hs3hH7L1Ng4VjzI/s1600/DSC_0555.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="267" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqWJBwxbDRMeBkv9pm86y4uebaPZjEGXsNtxbEnubxMC50Vc1cbVJw2z-CykWGyiS4mc78AHEfUb0RfWudpc1LDLmeC3Zmy0WrwJDXM4eSuDX4cDuRDKv3iPJynp11Hs3hH7L1Ng4VjzI/s400/DSC_0555.JPG" uda="true" width="400" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">My cousin Brooke, the example of all things beautiful in motherhood, with Will - the happiest baby ever.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-eW_XiHJqE89ARJuM9oVoVwQdI3v6F8H-gPbYQl9SYTaY6QykdzSBcZDuw6w-7xVAd6PPo9qSRWToVwUyZvNV_-r0qIeRrWKRj6gkNnUw3ck5gATvAK88PSjLXaxCRx4jtZpm-BHiXH0/s1600/DSC_0549.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-eW_XiHJqE89ARJuM9oVoVwQdI3v6F8H-gPbYQl9SYTaY6QykdzSBcZDuw6w-7xVAd6PPo9qSRWToVwUyZvNV_-r0qIeRrWKRj6gkNnUw3ck5gATvAK88PSjLXaxCRx4jtZpm-BHiXH0/s640/DSC_0549.JPG" uda="true" width="428" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Beautiful Kristen and me. We both got ready about 30 seconds before the guests arrived =)</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">I feel like I'm standing funny because Aunt Terri said she wanted to get my pregnant belly. Well, there it is. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEguUqivpAxk15z0ZFCuygX0n6ki4XmDFui9eARai_e2eogGz0mtVLz-BWY69SRlDWlaS8HaLy7xmUYZcaGsTl56FfjI6Ip6XS5Ydvu-R7diVZuIXDIFPTnIlWkrW20RJdLDQy6R7MprkjU/s1600/nat+and+kristen.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEguUqivpAxk15z0ZFCuygX0n6ki4XmDFui9eARai_e2eogGz0mtVLz-BWY69SRlDWlaS8HaLy7xmUYZcaGsTl56FfjI6Ip6XS5Ydvu-R7diVZuIXDIFPTnIlWkrW20RJdLDQy6R7MprkjU/s640/nat+and+kristen.jpg" uda="true" width="380" /></a></div>All in all, SUCH a fun day. All of my sisters, brothers-in-law, Kevin and Abbie spent hours with me to get it all together, but even that part was fun and maybe even more memorable than the actual event.<br />
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And in just a few weeks, I'll have a new niece! </div>Nataliehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12768195400316361623noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5928545399620364419.post-47162211664624943672012-02-14T11:23:00.000-08:002012-02-14T11:24:33.895-08:00on kissing and valentines dayWhen Jack got in the van today after school, he showed me the little box of chocolates Mia had given him. Mia is his best friend...and then some, as I learned from our conversation today:<br />
<br />
Me: So what did you say when she gave you those chocolates? <br />
Jack: I just hugged her....but sometimes we kiss.<br />
Me: Really? Well, we shouldn't kiss people who aren't in our family.<br />
Jack: But I love her so much. And it isn't long, it's just a quick one like *makes pecking sound* And Nathan told me to kiss her so he could see, but we didn't have time at recess today.<br />
Me: how many times have you kissed her?<br />
Jack: Lots of times, but not today on valentines day.<br />
Me: When do you kiss her, just at recess? <br />
Jack: No, mostly in the middle of the day, like at centers.<br />
Me: Does she kiss you, or do you kiss her?<br />
Jack: I kiss her.<br />
Me: What does she do? <br />
Jack: She starts kissing me a lot.<br />
Me: What does Mrs. Anderson say?<br />
Jack: She doesn't see us, so she doesn't say anything. But I only kiss her on the cheek. Not on the lips.<br />
Me: Alright, but we only kiss people in our family, so no more kissing okay? Just hugs.<br />
Jack: Okay...but I think I might forget sometimes. <br />
<br />
Ah, the thrill of kindergarten love! I remember kissing tag was one of the highlights of my first grade year. The boys would chase my friends and me and we'd "run away" but sort of half-heartedly, so we would soon be caught and kissed (on the cheek of course.)<br />
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As it turns out, I didn't ever actually kiss anyone until college, and that was a hilarious disaster that I'm a little embarrassed to remember. <br />
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<br />
Ah well, here we are, years later, and everything has turned out fine=) I was at the store with Jack last night, buying treats for his valentines. I loved how busy it was, with flowers and candy in every cart. I know there are some who don't like the holiday, but I think its nice. I have no expectations personally, though I've had some good ones in the past... usually very low key, but nice. I just like that people think about those they love. I like being in a store surrounded by people who all have good excuses to buy roses and balloons and greeting cards. I got caught up in it and bought tulips for Jack's teacher and strawberries so I could make Kevin crepes this morning. And I even bought that aweful strawberry syrup so my boys could have pink milk with their breakfast. they loved it of course. <br />
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I think I may make <a href="http://www.food.com/recipe/chicken-lazone-65768">this</a> for dinner. It is quick, a little fancy, and so good. I usually double the cream (sometimes using half and half, or whole milk in a bind) so we'll have extra sauce. And, yes, my healthy reader, that DOES sound like an awful amound of fat, and it IS. But the sauce. is. to. die. for. So, we make this meal about twice a year and never regret it. I make it with mashed potatoes and sop up the sauce with them. At the beginning of this paragraph I wrote that I may make tonight. After thinking about nothing but this meal for the past few minutes, I don't think I <em>can't</em> make it. It's that good.<br />
<br />
happy valentines day! I hope it's a little better than your average day, as I expect mine will be=)Nataliehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12768195400316361623noreply@blogger.com5