Taylor Day

Taylor has been acting out a bit lately. Yesterday just after we took these pictures:

Jack decided he wanted to hold Austin and ride too. The problem was, Taylor did not wish to move his legs. He is a stubborn fellow, especially on afternoons when he's refused a nap. Oh. my. goodness. He repeated "I don't want Jack to get in, I want him to pull, I don't want Jack to get in, I want him to pull, I don't want Jack to get in, I DON'T WANT JACK TO GET IN!.." All this being screamed as I carry Austin in one arm and pull Taylor with the other into the house. He sits on a chair and I try reasoning with him. Jack and Noah wait in the wagon as I try telling Taylor that we need to make room for everyone.

He calms down and we hold hands and head back outside, but begins flipping out again when he sees Jack in the wagon. Seeing the futility of my mission, I decide it's best to just pull the wagon into the garage, get everyone inside, and regain control of the situation. As I begin turning the wagon around, though, it tips and Jack and Noah both fall on their heads and immediately (understandably) start screaming.

Breathe...breathe...don't worry about what this must look and sound like to your neighbors. Deal with this situation one child at a time. Don't blame this on Taylor. Don't take your frustration out on him. Just breathe, comfort, carry inside, kiss, be calm.

That night as I tucked Taylor in bed I decided to try teaching him in a moment of love.
Me: Taylor, do remember today out in the wagon? Do you remember how Jack wanted to ride too?
Tays: I jus wanna put my feet in. I want Jack to pull us.
Me: I know, Tays, but you have 3 brothers. You have Jack and Noah and Austin and
Tays (anger in his voice): AND ME! You didn't say Taywor! And ME mom!

Seeing him get angry so easily, I decide perhaps this isn't the time to discuss it and we just say goodnight.

As I prayed last night I thought a lot of my little Taylor. What he's not getting from me that is causing him to act this way. Why he gets so angry, gets frustrated so quickly. I think it's attention, a feeling that I'm looking out for him and giving his needs a high priority. In his mind, his is a dog-eat-dog world and he has to take what's his and cling to it, at least this is how it seems to me. Not always, but often enough that I feel the need to make a change.

Today is "Taylor Day" and I'm doing all I can to meet his needs as quickly as possible, to make sure he knows how much I love him. As part of this, he WILL get a nap every day. It might take a lot of "Taylor Days" but I think it will bring out the happy little Tays I am missing.