Fifteen Years

This morning I spent three hours at the dentist, with more appointments to follow.  It had been ten years since I last sat in a dental chair.  Life gets away from me sometimes, especially those parts of life that I'd rather ignore anyway.  But we're getting all caught up now, yahoo.  The Nelson side of the family is setting goals together so we can collaboratively get more on the ball in our lives.  This month is flossing everyday (ouch, but getting better).  Next month is the official "get all medical and dental records caught up and organized" month but, as it has been a while and our insurance will not be as great starting Jan 1, we're getting a head start.  I do not love the puffy, tingly way my mouth feels right now, but I do love that we're finally doing it.

Yesterday my sister in law Nicole stopped by with a smoothie and a listening ear, just to be nice.  We'd talked briefly a few days ago and she said I'd sounded a little down.  I had been down, for various reasons, and it was a gesture that meant a lot to me.  I'm not one to typically wear my emotions on my sleeve, but I was grateful for her perceptiveness and resulting thoughtfulness.  Doubly appreciative because I know how busy her life is right now, with a successful business and three little boys of her own.  I know Heavenly Father had His hand in it, and am grateful that He takes care of me in just the right ways.  His tender mercies come in many forms to let me know He is very aware of my little life.

Lest you should be worried about me after that last paragraph, I'm doing really well.  I'm getting large, with just under four months of pregnancy to go, and I don't love the fact that I'm down to one pair of jeans that fits.  There are way too many flies in my house at any given moment, and I don't like that.  I have to catch up on laundry today, and I'd really rather not.  But in all that matters, things are good and I feel really lucky to have such a life.

Today marks fifteen years since my little brother Taylor passed away.  He was just barely three.  I posted more about that here.  I don't know how a mother can survive the loss of a child, how my own mom survived that loss.
My memories of him are memories of memories now.  He was a sweet, though somewhat serious child.  He was very imaginative and he loved animals.  He was well loved by all of us.  We've mused a few times that he would have been 18 this year, probably starting his Senior year, and wondered what he would be like, how the dynamics of our family would be different.  We'll see him again someday, of that I'm sure.  Another tender mercy, perhaps the most important one in this life.

And I look into the eyes of my own Taylor, as he begs me to come right now to turn on the bath because he and Jack are terribly muddy (we've had quite the storm today) and I feel blessed yet again.

PS.  If anyone has an amazing oatmeal cookie recipe, could you send it my way?  natalielarson @ gmail . com  Thanks!


  1. As you discuss the personality of your little brother Taylor, and your own Taylor, it makes me realize how unique and different each child can be. In so many ways, they just come the way they are. Those are really cute pictures of him.

  2. I can't believe it's been fifteen years. I remember when it happened, and I remember visiting your family and thinking how strong you all were. I especially remember seeing the bond between you and your siblings that was so evident. Those times in our life most definitely make us stronger...if we let it. Thanks again for sharing. I LOVE the way you write.

  3. He looks like you, Natalie. What precious memories. Until you meet again...

  4. What a beautiful tribute to your brother. I can't imagine losing a child or a brother either. What a great example your parents are.

  5. I will always remember how the last time I saw Taylor (at a family reunion) when you asked him what a giraffe said he would stick out his tongue. Darling boy!

    The best oatmeal cookie recipe I have found is on the quaker oatmeal box. Or if you want choclatey ones, the choc-oat-chip on the nestle baking website.

    I've been thinking about you a lot. We'll be in both Salt Lake and Spokane for Christmas so I'll for sure see you then. Hang in there pregnant lady!



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